(9) "Love Makes U Do The Wacky": Love gets three people arrested, Julian finally makes a decision, Darnell has jealousy issues, Stony finds out Z's been keeping something from him.
(10) "First Time 4 Everything": Darnell gets bad news, Vernon and Julian go out on a date, Stony gets advice, Z struggles getting over the past.
(11) "Cat's Outta The Bag": Malik has a surprising reaction to Darnell's confession, Julian gets a proposal, Z meets a psychic, Stony's surprise is ruined.
(12) "Puerto Rico..." (Season Finale, Part 1): Shocks & Scandals occur when the "Boyfriendz" and surprise guests go to Puerto Rico for Z's birthday. The Boyfriendz try to break Darnell's depression, Stony struggles with his proposal, Julian has doubts after he gets an interesting proposal from Vernon.
(13) "....Hoeeeee!" (Season Finale, Part 2) Terrance returns, Darnell's jealousy reaches its' peak, Z has a surprising reaction to Stony's proposal, Julian is faced with a difficult decision.
Which episode do you want to see the most?
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Sunday, October 11, 2009
Ep. 9, Scene 1 *Love Makes U Do The Wacky*
Scene 1
Lisa's-Interior-TableIt's been a week since "Sickning & In Demand". Julian, Stony, and Darnell are sitting down talking. Well, Darnell and Stony are talking, Julian is leaving Terrance yet, another voicemail.
Julian
Hey baby, it's me...
(looks at Darnell & Stony like "sorry")
I'm just...giving you a call. Again. Haven't seen you in...its been so many days already that I can't even remember, just...
(sighs)
Gimme a call when you get this...and the other twenty seven and half messages I left you.
(hangs up)
Ok. So I'm single.
(cries)
Oh my God, I'm singleeee. Why did I do this to myself, you guys? I started out with no man and than I got a man, than I HAD two men and now I have none.
(thinks; serious)
Ya'll think I got a hex on me?
Darnell and Stony laugh, Darnell sips some of his Evian.
Stony
I don't know WHAT you whining like Kanye West at the Grammy's for.
Darnell
The Grammy's?! That boy will whine at any award show that don't honor him for...wearing them glow in the dark space visors everytime he sing something about somebody loveee locking down...they are kinda sickning though, I gotta tell Z to make a note.
Julian
Kanye's on my "ish list" for what he said about Britney, he act like HE'S the most sickning performer of the year! Who does he think he is? Looking like a crazy reject out of "Sarafina."
Darnell
Well, YOU just went off!JulianI'm upset! And since I can't take it out on myself, I'm taking it out on Kanye...he deserves it anyway for what he said about Britney, she's a goddess.
Stony
Ok, Frick and Frac. Before we were derailed from our conversation about my baby's up and coming BORN day by your weekly episode of "Dumb Bitch, Pick Vernon"...
(clicks pen)
Where were we?
Darnell
(attitude)
WHAT is you and Z's fixation with the store clerk? I have seen CUTER...car babysitters.
Stony
(confused)
Who the hell are you talking about?
Julian
(shaking his head)
He means the people who do valet parking and Darnell for the last time, His NAME is Vernon! Not the store clerk! He doesn't even work at a store anymore!
Darnell
(picking up a menu)
Oh enough of this, I'm hungry. What we gonna eat?
There are a bunch of papers, brochures, and pamphlets on the table of different countries so not too much food can fit on it.
Stony
So guys, I was just thinking, I wanna go on a vacation...
Julian
I thought we were talking about Z's birthday plans? Clubbin? Party? Going to that...
(gets scared look on face)
Wax museum. Guys, I really don't wanna go there again, it creeps me OUT! NOBODY can tell me that the Michael Jackson figure thingy DIDN'T touch my ass.
Stony
We were talking about that but while ya'll was uselessy not helping? I decided that instead of doing some--lame party, I'M gonna use this an opportunity to dip into my "Never Going Back To My Momma's House" account and...take me a little vacation. I'm about to go into early retirement.
Darnell
Yeah, you and Z need it! She's been going on and on and on at work about that Kasey guy! I never thought I would find comfort in...being nice to a potential house buyer and...taking my time to actually sell them something good. Z has done the unthinkable. Remind me to give her a raise.
Julian
So you saying that basically you've been spending extra time actually DOING your job and selling LEGIT houses JUST so you can stop listening to Z talk about Kaiseem?
Darnell
Yes! AND I've been giving her one hour breaks and three day lunches but she won't take them! Cause she scared you gonna step on her again with the guy who fixes the elevator since Stony gota thing for the help who work in the building.
(to Stony)
YOU'VE passed your curse onto me and I aint gonna have itfor much longer. I hope you don't think that she's over your little Bill Clinton moment you had in the oral office.
Stony looks oblivious, he and Z discussed this and he was ok with it. Kaiseem hasn't been a problem since he told him off.
Stony
Apparently, I'm out of the loop, mary cause me and my boyfriend have been fine.
(to Julian)
We...have been...fine, right?
Julian's eyes widen, why do they think he always knows? I mean, he does but still.
Julian
(pause)
Z feels like her trust in you is fading. It's NOT that she doesn't love you or anything but...she's scared, Stony. That's all...I guess she--hasn't told you--yet.Stony looks insulted.
Stony
I don't know why?! I TOLD her that I didn't do anything with Kaiseem...
Darnell
Well, ya did kiss him.
Stony
YOU'RE cheating on Malik!
Darnell looks insulted.
JulianAnd you DID lie about it for a long time...
Stony
YOU cheated on Terrance in front of a crowd of people!
(ancy)
Come on, let's go, I am SNAPPY today maries! I can come back allll day, let's go.
Darnell and Julian look at each other, still getting over Stony their hypocrisy in their faces.
Darnell
Well, in my defense, Malik already KNEW I was a hot commodity when he got with me. It's not my fault that I was given something that can't be HELD back from the male species. I can't be missing out on...
Darnell sees a very handsome white guy walking past the window of Lisa's and he stops at the corner.
Darnell
All of THAT and HE can't miss out on all of this...
A car pulls up and Malik Kyle, Darnell's "boo", gets out and kisses the handsome man he was just looking at! Julian, Darnell, and Stony are shocked.
Stony
And apparently your boyfriend can't miss out on it either.
Darnell looks like he's actually hurt by the fact that Malik is apparently seeing someone else...and than suddenly, he grabs stomach as though he felt a sharp pain.
"Nah, nah, nah, naaaaah, nah, nah, nah. I Guess I just lost my husband, I don't know where he went..."
Z/Stony's Apartment Building-Courtyard
"So What" by P!nk opens the scene. Z walks outside in flip flops, shorts, shades, a fitted, and a cute little jacket. She sees Kaiseem standing there, looking at him with a very stern expression with his arms crossed. Z looks at him like "Is there a problem?". Kaiseem just smirks at him cockily, Z decides it time to confront the bitch so he walks over to him.
Z
Um, you was looking kinda hard so I wanted to see what the problem was. Is THERE...
(takes off flip flops)
A problem? Oh wait, YES there IS a problem cause I KNOW you was trying to steal my man right from under my nose! Kissing him, taking him to dinners, threatening him? Who the hell do you think you are trying to come in and disrupt MY organized dysfunction that I've put THREE years into perfecting?
Kaiseem
Listen...Z, V, whatever you--call yourself...Z looks like "oh no, this bitch didn't" and takes off his jacket.
Kaiseem
To be perfectly honest with you, yeah I kissed Stony. Cause I want him back and I don't think he has ANY kind of business with you...
Z takes off the little bracelets on his arm, paying no attention to Kaiseem as Kaiseem keeps talking.
Kaiseem
Stony couldn't get over me, that's why he chose you, I hurt him and...
Z takes off his hat and places it on the floor nicely and han punches Kaiseem who falls out out of view and Z goes offscreen, continuing to attack him. You can hear punches being thrown and faces being bruised.
End of Scene.
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Lisa's-Interior-TableIt's been a week since "Sickning & In Demand". Julian, Stony, and Darnell are sitting down talking. Well, Darnell and Stony are talking, Julian is leaving Terrance yet, another voicemail.
Julian
Hey baby, it's me...
(looks at Darnell & Stony like "sorry")
I'm just...giving you a call. Again. Haven't seen you in...its been so many days already that I can't even remember, just...
(sighs)
Gimme a call when you get this...and the other twenty seven and half messages I left you.
(hangs up)
Ok. So I'm single.
(cries)
Oh my God, I'm singleeee. Why did I do this to myself, you guys? I started out with no man and than I got a man, than I HAD two men and now I have none.
(thinks; serious)
Ya'll think I got a hex on me?
Darnell and Stony laugh, Darnell sips some of his Evian.
Stony
I don't know WHAT you whining like Kanye West at the Grammy's for.
Darnell
The Grammy's?! That boy will whine at any award show that don't honor him for...wearing them glow in the dark space visors everytime he sing something about somebody loveee locking down...they are kinda sickning though, I gotta tell Z to make a note.
Julian
Kanye's on my "ish list" for what he said about Britney, he act like HE'S the most sickning performer of the year! Who does he think he is? Looking like a crazy reject out of "Sarafina."
Darnell
Well, YOU just went off!JulianI'm upset! And since I can't take it out on myself, I'm taking it out on Kanye...he deserves it anyway for what he said about Britney, she's a goddess.
Stony
Ok, Frick and Frac. Before we were derailed from our conversation about my baby's up and coming BORN day by your weekly episode of "Dumb Bitch, Pick Vernon"...
(clicks pen)
Where were we?
Darnell
(attitude)
WHAT is you and Z's fixation with the store clerk? I have seen CUTER...car babysitters.
Stony
(confused)
Who the hell are you talking about?
Julian
(shaking his head)
He means the people who do valet parking and Darnell for the last time, His NAME is Vernon! Not the store clerk! He doesn't even work at a store anymore!
Darnell
(picking up a menu)
Oh enough of this, I'm hungry. What we gonna eat?
There are a bunch of papers, brochures, and pamphlets on the table of different countries so not too much food can fit on it.
Stony
So guys, I was just thinking, I wanna go on a vacation...
Julian
I thought we were talking about Z's birthday plans? Clubbin? Party? Going to that...
(gets scared look on face)
Wax museum. Guys, I really don't wanna go there again, it creeps me OUT! NOBODY can tell me that the Michael Jackson figure thingy DIDN'T touch my ass.
Stony
We were talking about that but while ya'll was uselessy not helping? I decided that instead of doing some--lame party, I'M gonna use this an opportunity to dip into my "Never Going Back To My Momma's House" account and...take me a little vacation. I'm about to go into early retirement.
Darnell
Yeah, you and Z need it! She's been going on and on and on at work about that Kasey guy! I never thought I would find comfort in...being nice to a potential house buyer and...taking my time to actually sell them something good. Z has done the unthinkable. Remind me to give her a raise.
Julian
So you saying that basically you've been spending extra time actually DOING your job and selling LEGIT houses JUST so you can stop listening to Z talk about Kaiseem?
Darnell
Yes! AND I've been giving her one hour breaks and three day lunches but she won't take them! Cause she scared you gonna step on her again with the guy who fixes the elevator since Stony gota thing for the help who work in the building.
(to Stony)
YOU'VE passed your curse onto me and I aint gonna have itfor much longer. I hope you don't think that she's over your little Bill Clinton moment you had in the oral office.
Stony looks oblivious, he and Z discussed this and he was ok with it. Kaiseem hasn't been a problem since he told him off.
Stony
Apparently, I'm out of the loop, mary cause me and my boyfriend have been fine.
(to Julian)
We...have been...fine, right?
Julian's eyes widen, why do they think he always knows? I mean, he does but still.
Julian
(pause)
Z feels like her trust in you is fading. It's NOT that she doesn't love you or anything but...she's scared, Stony. That's all...I guess she--hasn't told you--yet.Stony looks insulted.
Stony
I don't know why?! I TOLD her that I didn't do anything with Kaiseem...
Darnell
Well, ya did kiss him.
Stony
YOU'RE cheating on Malik!
Darnell looks insulted.
JulianAnd you DID lie about it for a long time...
Stony
YOU cheated on Terrance in front of a crowd of people!
(ancy)
Come on, let's go, I am SNAPPY today maries! I can come back allll day, let's go.
Darnell and Julian look at each other, still getting over Stony their hypocrisy in their faces.
Darnell
Well, in my defense, Malik already KNEW I was a hot commodity when he got with me. It's not my fault that I was given something that can't be HELD back from the male species. I can't be missing out on...
Darnell sees a very handsome white guy walking past the window of Lisa's and he stops at the corner.
Darnell
All of THAT and HE can't miss out on all of this...
A car pulls up and Malik Kyle, Darnell's "boo", gets out and kisses the handsome man he was just looking at! Julian, Darnell, and Stony are shocked.
Stony
And apparently your boyfriend can't miss out on it either.
Darnell looks like he's actually hurt by the fact that Malik is apparently seeing someone else...and than suddenly, he grabs stomach as though he felt a sharp pain.
"Nah, nah, nah, naaaaah, nah, nah, nah. I Guess I just lost my husband, I don't know where he went..."
Z/Stony's Apartment Building-Courtyard
"So What" by P!nk opens the scene. Z walks outside in flip flops, shorts, shades, a fitted, and a cute little jacket. She sees Kaiseem standing there, looking at him with a very stern expression with his arms crossed. Z looks at him like "Is there a problem?". Kaiseem just smirks at him cockily, Z decides it time to confront the bitch so he walks over to him.
Z
Um, you was looking kinda hard so I wanted to see what the problem was. Is THERE...
(takes off flip flops)
A problem? Oh wait, YES there IS a problem cause I KNOW you was trying to steal my man right from under my nose! Kissing him, taking him to dinners, threatening him? Who the hell do you think you are trying to come in and disrupt MY organized dysfunction that I've put THREE years into perfecting?
Kaiseem
Listen...Z, V, whatever you--call yourself...Z looks like "oh no, this bitch didn't" and takes off his jacket.
Kaiseem
To be perfectly honest with you, yeah I kissed Stony. Cause I want him back and I don't think he has ANY kind of business with you...
Z takes off the little bracelets on his arm, paying no attention to Kaiseem as Kaiseem keeps talking.
Kaiseem
Stony couldn't get over me, that's why he chose you, I hurt him and...
Z takes off his hat and places it on the floor nicely and han punches Kaiseem who falls out out of view and Z goes offscreen, continuing to attack him. You can hear punches being thrown and faces being bruised.
End of Scene.
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*Julian's Thoughts on Ep. 8*
From beginning to end...Z's drag show was nuts. The fog, Terrence not being able to dance to save anyone's life, Vernon showing up at the club working there as a bartender? And of course, who can forget the show itself? I totally blew it...
I am more confused than ever! Terrence is the best thing in my life right now aside from my friends and...I care about him a lot but it finally happened. The event that's played over and over and over again in my mind actually came to frutation...Vernon wants to be with me, he wants to TRY something!
Can you believe that?
This is the greatest timing for this to happen! And...Terrence hasn't spoken to me since the kiss during the performance. I've been calling him and calling him...I need to talk to him. I need to see him.
And Darnell is cheating on Malik but still catering to Maik at the same time and Stony and Z...they're the most they've been in a long time ever since the whole Kaiseem thing. Hopefully, this turns out...I don't know how it's gonna turn out.
Later.
I am more confused than ever! Terrence is the best thing in my life right now aside from my friends and...I care about him a lot but it finally happened. The event that's played over and over and over again in my mind actually came to frutation...Vernon wants to be with me, he wants to TRY something!
Can you believe that?
This is the greatest timing for this to happen! And...Terrence hasn't spoken to me since the kiss during the performance. I've been calling him and calling him...I need to talk to him. I need to see him.
And Darnell is cheating on Malik but still catering to Maik at the same time and Stony and Z...they're the most they've been in a long time ever since the whole Kaiseem thing. Hopefully, this turns out...I don't know how it's gonna turn out.
Later.
Ep. 8, Scene 6 *Spotlight*
Scene 6
"Well, I don't like, living under your spotlight. Just because ya think I might, find somebody worthy...."Secrets-Interior-Dressing Room"Spotlight" by Jennifer Hudson opens the scene.
The club has now closed, Stony is taking some of the bags out of the dressing room, leaving Z and Julian alone. Z has returned to his former self, the remnants of make-up still on his face and Julian is looking down at the ground.
Julian
He...he said it, Z. Vernon SAID what I've...
(sighs)
Been...
(corrects himself)
What I USED to...wanna hear. He said he wanted me.
Z
Well, I could tell he wanted you mary from the kiss he planted on you heard, round, the world! The question now is...what are YOU gonna do?
Julian feels horrible because he really cares about Terrance but...
Julian
You KNOW--how long I've wanted to be with Vernon. How MUCH I felt for him. You and Darnell...you were SO scared that I would get hurt because of Vernon's--indecisiveness...
(softly)
So how come it's his DECISION to be with me that hurts so much?
Z
Becauuuuse...
(rubs Julian's arm)
You falling for Terrance, girl.
Julian
Yeah.
(Pause)
But what if I was already--knocked down before I met him?
Just than Vernon walks in, seeing Z and Julian. Z knows that Vernon and Julian need to be left alone.
Z
(to Julian)
I'm gonna go--find Big Sal before he uses my booking money to buy more corndogs than I'll have to break my heel across the back of his head.
(to Vernon)
TRY keeping ya lips to yaself, Prince Charming, there are cameras back here.
Z hugs Julian and than leaves the room, leaving Julian and Vernon alone. Julian just stares at him with his arms crossed.
Vernon
I know you're mad about the kiss but it just--felt right. And...
Julian
Ya damn right, I'm mad! No. You're wrong. I am BE-yond mad! I passed MAD when my BOYfriend, BOY-FRIEND walked OUT on me.
Vernon
I'm sorry, Julian, ok, I'm sorry!
Julian shakes his head, this is not the way things with Vernon were supposed to go in his head. Vernon knows he screwed up but it's like...
Vernon
I CAN'T hold it back anymore! I KNOW what I said to you before about being too late, about--giving up but...
Julian shakes his head, he doesn't want to hear this.JulianI can't listen to this right now...Julian tries to leave but Vernon grabs his arm, stopping him and turning him around...like they did in the performance.
Vernon
Being away from you for a month KILLED me.
Julian
It--it did?
Vernon
Yes...it did. But do you know what killed me more? Being away from you knowing that you were here with Terrance...it takes losing something good to know when something good is...looking you right in the face. Vernon's hand slides from Julian's arm to his hand, holding it.
Vernon
Julian...from the first day I saw you, I knew--you were different.
Julian
You didn't know I was gay...
Vernon
I didn't know you were gay, no. I had a feeling but--I didn't know. But you weren't because you could have possibly liked men, you were different because...you made me feel right. For the first time in my whole life. You made me feel like...I could smile just cause you said so. Or well, in most cases cause I can't help it when I'm around you.
Julian can't help but feel all kinds of flattered even id he does have a boyfriend, it's his dream come true!
Julian
Vernon, I...do you realize that I have--imagined--this--very moment time and time and time again? Every day since we met? I wish I could have just...said something to you before about how I felt and threw whatever consequences out the window and now that I know there WOULDN'T have been any consequences, I feel like the ONLY idiot...
Vernon
You have feelings for me?
Julian looks caught, he can't admit that.
Julian
HAD. HAD feelings for you, Vernon.
Vernon
So that kiss...you didn't feel a thing?
Julian
Nope. Nothing at all.
Vernon looks like he doesn't believe him but...he isn't going to push.
Vernon
(nods head)
Ight than I guess there's no point in even trying to...
Julian has been fighting the urge but he can't resist any longer and he cups Vernon's face, kissing him passionately! This is what he's always wanted. This right here. Vernon wraps his arms around Julian's body, kissing him back...both of them indulging in each other and the fact that they get to act on their feelings finally.
End of Episode.
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"Well, I don't like, living under your spotlight. Just because ya think I might, find somebody worthy...."Secrets-Interior-Dressing Room"Spotlight" by Jennifer Hudson opens the scene.
The club has now closed, Stony is taking some of the bags out of the dressing room, leaving Z and Julian alone. Z has returned to his former self, the remnants of make-up still on his face and Julian is looking down at the ground.
Julian
He...he said it, Z. Vernon SAID what I've...
(sighs)
Been...
(corrects himself)
What I USED to...wanna hear. He said he wanted me.
Z
Well, I could tell he wanted you mary from the kiss he planted on you heard, round, the world! The question now is...what are YOU gonna do?
Julian feels horrible because he really cares about Terrance but...
Julian
You KNOW--how long I've wanted to be with Vernon. How MUCH I felt for him. You and Darnell...you were SO scared that I would get hurt because of Vernon's--indecisiveness...
(softly)
So how come it's his DECISION to be with me that hurts so much?
Z
Becauuuuse...
(rubs Julian's arm)
You falling for Terrance, girl.
Julian
Yeah.
(Pause)
But what if I was already--knocked down before I met him?
Just than Vernon walks in, seeing Z and Julian. Z knows that Vernon and Julian need to be left alone.
Z
(to Julian)
I'm gonna go--find Big Sal before he uses my booking money to buy more corndogs than I'll have to break my heel across the back of his head.
(to Vernon)
TRY keeping ya lips to yaself, Prince Charming, there are cameras back here.
Z hugs Julian and than leaves the room, leaving Julian and Vernon alone. Julian just stares at him with his arms crossed.
Vernon
I know you're mad about the kiss but it just--felt right. And...
Julian
Ya damn right, I'm mad! No. You're wrong. I am BE-yond mad! I passed MAD when my BOYfriend, BOY-FRIEND walked OUT on me.
Vernon
I'm sorry, Julian, ok, I'm sorry!
Julian shakes his head, this is not the way things with Vernon were supposed to go in his head. Vernon knows he screwed up but it's like...
Vernon
I CAN'T hold it back anymore! I KNOW what I said to you before about being too late, about--giving up but...
Julian shakes his head, he doesn't want to hear this.JulianI can't listen to this right now...Julian tries to leave but Vernon grabs his arm, stopping him and turning him around...like they did in the performance.
Vernon
Being away from you for a month KILLED me.
Julian
It--it did?
Vernon
Yes...it did. But do you know what killed me more? Being away from you knowing that you were here with Terrance...it takes losing something good to know when something good is...looking you right in the face. Vernon's hand slides from Julian's arm to his hand, holding it.
Vernon
Julian...from the first day I saw you, I knew--you were different.
Julian
You didn't know I was gay...
Vernon
I didn't know you were gay, no. I had a feeling but--I didn't know. But you weren't because you could have possibly liked men, you were different because...you made me feel right. For the first time in my whole life. You made me feel like...I could smile just cause you said so. Or well, in most cases cause I can't help it when I'm around you.
Julian can't help but feel all kinds of flattered even id he does have a boyfriend, it's his dream come true!
Julian
Vernon, I...do you realize that I have--imagined--this--very moment time and time and time again? Every day since we met? I wish I could have just...said something to you before about how I felt and threw whatever consequences out the window and now that I know there WOULDN'T have been any consequences, I feel like the ONLY idiot...
Vernon
You have feelings for me?
Julian looks caught, he can't admit that.
Julian
HAD. HAD feelings for you, Vernon.
Vernon
So that kiss...you didn't feel a thing?
Julian
Nope. Nothing at all.
Vernon looks like he doesn't believe him but...he isn't going to push.
Vernon
(nods head)
Ight than I guess there's no point in even trying to...
Julian has been fighting the urge but he can't resist any longer and he cups Vernon's face, kissing him passionately! This is what he's always wanted. This right here. Vernon wraps his arms around Julian's body, kissing him back...both of them indulging in each other and the fact that they get to act on their feelings finally.
End of Episode.
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Ep. 8, Scene 4 *The Kiss Heard Round The World*
Scene 4
Secrets-Interior
Everyone is starting to get seated, the lights are low except for the ones on the dance floor. Terrance comes in with a bouquet of flowers, having gotten Julian's text earlier about Vernon replacing him in Z's performance. Terrace looks excited to see his baby do his thing and spots Stony and Darnell sitting at a table, Darnel is kissing up on some random guy, not pay attention to the introduction of Zaynah.
Stony
Hey, you got here just in time, they're about to perform.
Terrance
(excited)
Yeah, I rushed from my meeting to get here, our wives are about to kill it!
Angel Sheridan
And now everyone for your VIEWING pleasure, we're gonna bring you lights, we're gonna bring you dazzle but most importantly...we're gonna bring you our new sexyyyy bartender that I've already had the pleasure of pleasuring...
(shyly)
Oops, I mean meeting. He's making his FIRST debut here at Secrets as one of Zaynah's new dancers...
(like a smitten school girl)
And my future husband's name is Vernon, if any--one was wondering.
Terrance doesn't look like he's happy to hear about Vernon dancing with Z and Julian.
Secrets-Interior-Behind Curtain
Behind the curtain, Z is decked out as Zaynah and she looks, in the signature word of the "Boyfriendz"--SICKNING! Julian and Vernon are also wearing customes (black tanks, black booty shorts, and black sneakers). Vernon looks nervous as hell while Julian looks excited though. The crowd is going wild.
Vernon
(hiding nerves)
Wow, people really wanna see Z, huh? First drag show, got the nerves? Listen, what I said tonight I...
Julian
Vernon, please. I NEED to focus.
"Zaynah" finally speaks, snapping her head to look back at them.
Z
And I NEED to know what the HELL is going on! But I will beat BOTH of you within an inch of YOUR lives if you mess up my show!
Julian and Vernon both straighten up, getting ready to perform at Z's demand.
Angel SheridanAnd without further delay...Zaynah!
"La La La, La La--La La La..."
Z begins to perform "If U Seek Amy".
Z
(lipsyncing)
"Oh baby, baby...(points to Julian)
Have ya seen Amy tonight?"
Z begins to perform to the left of the stage with the spotlight on her while Julian and Vernon are leaning against a wall on the right side of the stage with Vernon leaning over Julian, his hand on the wall. They are...very close to each other, Terrance shifts in his seat at their closeness.
Terrance
Heyyy um, this aint what we practiced, Stony, what's...
(getting uncomfortable)
Wh--what's this? Why he all over my boo like that?
Stony
Ohhhh yeah. Julian had to--change some of the choreography since Vernon's like Usher of the gay world or something, all these boys are jealoussss of Julian.
Terrance
What for? V-8 can't do it like ME...
(standing up from the chair)
Let me go up there and do my thing...
Darnell breaks away from kissing the guy that he's been kissing, pulling Terrance back into his seat.
Darnel
lOh nooo, we heard about you no rhythm nation.
Blaring sirens are heard as the song changes into "Womanizer". Z, Vernon, and Julian are doing great dance moves and a very clean routine. Throughout the performance, Vernon and Julian are "fighting", playing the roles of a broken up couple, Vernon's "womanized" Julian and now Julian, along with Z's help is "getting him back by kicking his ass." Z stops dancing and goes off to the side, "lipsyncing" to the "fake" couple of Julian and Vernon.
"Maybe if we both lived in a different world..."
Julian has his finger on Vernon's chest, smirking sexily because he's very much enjoying performing with Vernon and "playing these characters". Vernon's walking backward and hits the wall, Julian gets in his face with an expression like "yeah, I got you back NOW" (playing the role of the scorned boyfriend). Z's still "lipsyncing" as the "narrator" of this story between her two dancers.
"It would be all good and baby, I could be your girl..."
Julian turns around, like he's leaving Vernon and in an interesting twist, Vernon grabs Julian's arm--pulling him back to him and kissing him like whoa! Julian is shocked, this isn't part of the routine...but he goes with it and the two start kissing passionately even if it's only for a few seconds.Terrance looks pissed off. Stony looks like "mmhmm, I knew he wanted him!" And Darnell has even stopped kissing his booty call for the night to look at the long, anticipated Julian/Vernon first kiss.
"Cause we don't..."
Z, Vernon, and Julian go into a sickning dance break and continue dancing. They finish the performance and the crowd goes wild, giving a standing ovation. Julian, Z, and Vernon look happy...Julian's smile however fades when he sees the look on Terrance's face and than watches helplessly as his boyfriend gets up from the table and leaves the club. The flowers he brought for Julian still on the table.
"You're a woma-niz-er, baby!"
End of Scene.
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Secrets-Interior
Everyone is starting to get seated, the lights are low except for the ones on the dance floor. Terrance comes in with a bouquet of flowers, having gotten Julian's text earlier about Vernon replacing him in Z's performance. Terrace looks excited to see his baby do his thing and spots Stony and Darnell sitting at a table, Darnel is kissing up on some random guy, not pay attention to the introduction of Zaynah.
Stony
Hey, you got here just in time, they're about to perform.
Terrance
(excited)
Yeah, I rushed from my meeting to get here, our wives are about to kill it!
Angel Sheridan
And now everyone for your VIEWING pleasure, we're gonna bring you lights, we're gonna bring you dazzle but most importantly...we're gonna bring you our new sexyyyy bartender that I've already had the pleasure of pleasuring...
(shyly)
Oops, I mean meeting. He's making his FIRST debut here at Secrets as one of Zaynah's new dancers...
(like a smitten school girl)
And my future husband's name is Vernon, if any--one was wondering.
Terrance doesn't look like he's happy to hear about Vernon dancing with Z and Julian.
Secrets-Interior-Behind Curtain
Behind the curtain, Z is decked out as Zaynah and she looks, in the signature word of the "Boyfriendz"--SICKNING! Julian and Vernon are also wearing customes (black tanks, black booty shorts, and black sneakers). Vernon looks nervous as hell while Julian looks excited though. The crowd is going wild.
Vernon
(hiding nerves)
Wow, people really wanna see Z, huh? First drag show, got the nerves? Listen, what I said tonight I...
Julian
Vernon, please. I NEED to focus.
"Zaynah" finally speaks, snapping her head to look back at them.
Z
And I NEED to know what the HELL is going on! But I will beat BOTH of you within an inch of YOUR lives if you mess up my show!
Julian and Vernon both straighten up, getting ready to perform at Z's demand.
Angel SheridanAnd without further delay...Zaynah!
"La La La, La La--La La La..."
Z begins to perform "If U Seek Amy".
Z
(lipsyncing)
"Oh baby, baby...(points to Julian)
Have ya seen Amy tonight?"
Z begins to perform to the left of the stage with the spotlight on her while Julian and Vernon are leaning against a wall on the right side of the stage with Vernon leaning over Julian, his hand on the wall. They are...very close to each other, Terrance shifts in his seat at their closeness.
Terrance
Heyyy um, this aint what we practiced, Stony, what's...
(getting uncomfortable)
Wh--what's this? Why he all over my boo like that?
Stony
Ohhhh yeah. Julian had to--change some of the choreography since Vernon's like Usher of the gay world or something, all these boys are jealoussss of Julian.
Terrance
What for? V-8 can't do it like ME...
(standing up from the chair)
Let me go up there and do my thing...
Darnell breaks away from kissing the guy that he's been kissing, pulling Terrance back into his seat.
Darnel
lOh nooo, we heard about you no rhythm nation.
Blaring sirens are heard as the song changes into "Womanizer". Z, Vernon, and Julian are doing great dance moves and a very clean routine. Throughout the performance, Vernon and Julian are "fighting", playing the roles of a broken up couple, Vernon's "womanized" Julian and now Julian, along with Z's help is "getting him back by kicking his ass." Z stops dancing and goes off to the side, "lipsyncing" to the "fake" couple of Julian and Vernon.
"Maybe if we both lived in a different world..."
Julian has his finger on Vernon's chest, smirking sexily because he's very much enjoying performing with Vernon and "playing these characters". Vernon's walking backward and hits the wall, Julian gets in his face with an expression like "yeah, I got you back NOW" (playing the role of the scorned boyfriend). Z's still "lipsyncing" as the "narrator" of this story between her two dancers.
"It would be all good and baby, I could be your girl..."
Julian turns around, like he's leaving Vernon and in an interesting twist, Vernon grabs Julian's arm--pulling him back to him and kissing him like whoa! Julian is shocked, this isn't part of the routine...but he goes with it and the two start kissing passionately even if it's only for a few seconds.Terrance looks pissed off. Stony looks like "mmhmm, I knew he wanted him!" And Darnell has even stopped kissing his booty call for the night to look at the long, anticipated Julian/Vernon first kiss.
"Cause we don't..."
Z, Vernon, and Julian go into a sickning dance break and continue dancing. They finish the performance and the crowd goes wild, giving a standing ovation. Julian, Z, and Vernon look happy...Julian's smile however fades when he sees the look on Terrance's face and than watches helplessly as his boyfriend gets up from the table and leaves the club. The flowers he brought for Julian still on the table.
"You're a woma-niz-er, baby!"
End of Scene.
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Ep. 8, Scene 3 *The Moment You've All Been Waiting For!"
The door opens, Z walks in holding some bags, Julian and Vernon follow behind him. Julian closes the door, the two of them are also holding bags.
Z
(shocked)
Oh my God, this house is a mess, baby?! You coulda cleaned UP a little, we have...
(gestures toward Julian and Vernon with his head)
Com-pa-ny.
Stony
(looking down at the shoe)
Terrance aint no company, baby, that boy is like a fly on Julian's ass, wherever Julian go, he(looks up; sees Vernon)
Goooo...YOU'RE not Terrance, you'reeee...
(looks at Julian)
Mary, WHAT did you do now? I can't be keeping up with all these changesss and these kids...OH MY GOD, the kids!
Stony realizes he forgot the kids in the "no air" room, he runs to the back hastily.
Stony
Ya'll still breathing?
The kids sound rowdy, literally like animals and you can hear them fighting to get out of the room.
Stony
(grunting)
I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE...!
Darnell
Yeah, where's Terrance? And WHO invited him?
Z
I invited him, Darnell. Vernon is going to replace Terrance in the numba! He had a radio thing, thank Jesus!
(crosses arms, attitude)
So tonight is a GOOD night, you not gonna be CASTING no black shadows over MY performance with all them evil spirits!
(takes out holy water and splashes it on Darnell)
We're going to be NICE...RIGHT?
Darnell
I know you get a little crazy around performance time so I'ma let the fact that you just ruined a three hundred suit with your voodoo concoction and dock it out your pay...
(jumps up and down)
Haha, I win!
Darnell walks away to go back to sewing and talking on the phone. Julian sighs--his friends are--ridiculous. Poor Vernon, he really wasn't a bad guy, just...confused with who he was, that's all. The look on Vernon's face shows that he knows Darnell has mixed opinions about him.
Vernon
Where should we take this stuff?
Z
To the...
(snaps)
"Chamber of Beautification where the...
(snaps twice in the air)
"Goddess of Entertainment", transFORMSSS herself into the...
Stony
The bathroom, mary, he's talking BOUT THE BATHROOM!
Stony takes Z to their bedroom while Julian and Vernon go into the back, they go to open one door but you hear "animal like" growls coming from it, Julian stops.
Julian
Oh no, I forgot, the children of the corn parts 1 and 2 are in there.
Julian quickly goes to the other door which is the bathroom. Vernon follows him in and they close the door behind them. The bathroom is cluttered with hair dryers, brushes, and wigs.
"Common Denominator" starts playing softly in the background.
"When it comes to ya love their aint much to figure outtt. YOU make me feel secure in my mind, there aint no doubt, boy when I think about it, it's like you're made for meee. No matter what I'm facing, you complete my equation, common denominator..."
The bathroom's pretty small in essence so Julian and Vernon are in very close corners. Julian turns around, trying to put a bag down and ends up in Vernon's face, he smiles.
Vernon
(kind of excited)
This is crazy you know that? Your friends, they a litttle rude but that's only cause they don't know me. We wouldn't be friends if I wasn't a good guy, right? And Z likes me and he like--rules ALL of you guys, so I'm in.
Julian is a little thrown off, Vernon's acting a little weird. He turns around and happens to be looking in the mirror...Vernon is standing behind him and he can see his reflection in the mirror as well. Right...behind him. Just them. The two of them. Vernon and Julian. Julian smiles slightly, knowing that this can NOT go there.
Julian
Z is really...I can't really find the word to describe it because there isn't one, Z's just...Z. She likes things her way and yeah, she's a liiiittle high strung...
Vernon
(finishing his sentence)
But that's just who she is.Julian eyes blink a few times...
Vernon doesn't sound like Vernon. He sounds like...Vernon sighs deeply, turning Julian around to face him. He knows that this is his only chance to say it. Nothing else matters. It has to finally be said. Julian looks nervous, scared, is Vernon on drugs?
Vernon
Julian, Jewelz...I'm done lying. I want YOU. I--WANT--YOU!A burden has been lifted off his shoulders, he can finally say those words.
Julian looks like he's been hit with a stick made out of the hardest metal possible. He doesn't know what to say...he had been wanting to hear those words for so long.
Vernon
But...I know I'm too late.What?
Julian was not ready for that one either. He was kinda hoping something else would happen...VernonI realized a lot while I was gone, Julian and...you're the dude I want to...try this with...
(tries to find words; laughs slightly)
What*EVER* it is we have between us cause...
(looks into Julian's eyes)
I KNOW that we got something...I always have, I just...couldn't figure out what I was.
Julian puts his finger up signalling Vernon to stop which he does. Julian's face is just about as shocked as the viewer. After all this time? All this time? This fine ass man who he's wanted ACTUALLY wants HIM now? Something's gotta be wrong...
Julian
THIS--isn't--one of--those--day--dreams...is it?
Vernon
(smirks)
You daydream about me? That's cute, Jewelz...
Julian
Nope, it's not cause in my daydreams, we'd be kissing already.Vernon gets a sexy look on his face, all he had to do was ask. The door opens, breaking the moment between them...it's Z.
Z
You are NOW the...
(snaps twice)
"Sickning Diva of...
(serious)
I don't have TIME for this MESS tonight." If U Seekay each other on your own time, WE gotta be at the club before Big Sal eats all the corndogs I left for him...
Julian
What are the corndogs for?
Z
So he'll be distracted when I release my FRIGGIN FOG!
(like drill sergeant)
Move, move, move!
End of Scene.
Now that Vernon's revealed his feelings to Julian...what will happen next?
Send comments to twitter.com/boyfriendznew
Z
(shocked)
Oh my God, this house is a mess, baby?! You coulda cleaned UP a little, we have...
(gestures toward Julian and Vernon with his head)
Com-pa-ny.
Stony
(looking down at the shoe)
Terrance aint no company, baby, that boy is like a fly on Julian's ass, wherever Julian go, he(looks up; sees Vernon)
Goooo...YOU'RE not Terrance, you'reeee...
(looks at Julian)
Mary, WHAT did you do now? I can't be keeping up with all these changesss and these kids...OH MY GOD, the kids!
Stony realizes he forgot the kids in the "no air" room, he runs to the back hastily.
Stony
Ya'll still breathing?
The kids sound rowdy, literally like animals and you can hear them fighting to get out of the room.
Stony
(grunting)
I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE...!
Darnell
Yeah, where's Terrance? And WHO invited him?
Z
I invited him, Darnell. Vernon is going to replace Terrance in the numba! He had a radio thing, thank Jesus!
(crosses arms, attitude)
So tonight is a GOOD night, you not gonna be CASTING no black shadows over MY performance with all them evil spirits!
(takes out holy water and splashes it on Darnell)
We're going to be NICE...RIGHT?
Darnell
I know you get a little crazy around performance time so I'ma let the fact that you just ruined a three hundred suit with your voodoo concoction and dock it out your pay...
(jumps up and down)
Haha, I win!
Darnell walks away to go back to sewing and talking on the phone. Julian sighs--his friends are--ridiculous. Poor Vernon, he really wasn't a bad guy, just...confused with who he was, that's all. The look on Vernon's face shows that he knows Darnell has mixed opinions about him.
Vernon
Where should we take this stuff?
Z
To the...
(snaps)
"Chamber of Beautification where the...
(snaps twice in the air)
"Goddess of Entertainment", transFORMSSS herself into the...
Stony
The bathroom, mary, he's talking BOUT THE BATHROOM!
Stony takes Z to their bedroom while Julian and Vernon go into the back, they go to open one door but you hear "animal like" growls coming from it, Julian stops.
Julian
Oh no, I forgot, the children of the corn parts 1 and 2 are in there.
Julian quickly goes to the other door which is the bathroom. Vernon follows him in and they close the door behind them. The bathroom is cluttered with hair dryers, brushes, and wigs.
"Common Denominator" starts playing softly in the background.
"When it comes to ya love their aint much to figure outtt. YOU make me feel secure in my mind, there aint no doubt, boy when I think about it, it's like you're made for meee. No matter what I'm facing, you complete my equation, common denominator..."
The bathroom's pretty small in essence so Julian and Vernon are in very close corners. Julian turns around, trying to put a bag down and ends up in Vernon's face, he smiles.
Vernon
(kind of excited)
This is crazy you know that? Your friends, they a litttle rude but that's only cause they don't know me. We wouldn't be friends if I wasn't a good guy, right? And Z likes me and he like--rules ALL of you guys, so I'm in.
Julian is a little thrown off, Vernon's acting a little weird. He turns around and happens to be looking in the mirror...Vernon is standing behind him and he can see his reflection in the mirror as well. Right...behind him. Just them. The two of them. Vernon and Julian. Julian smiles slightly, knowing that this can NOT go there.
Julian
Z is really...I can't really find the word to describe it because there isn't one, Z's just...Z. She likes things her way and yeah, she's a liiiittle high strung...
Vernon
(finishing his sentence)
But that's just who she is.Julian eyes blink a few times...
Vernon doesn't sound like Vernon. He sounds like...Vernon sighs deeply, turning Julian around to face him. He knows that this is his only chance to say it. Nothing else matters. It has to finally be said. Julian looks nervous, scared, is Vernon on drugs?
Vernon
Julian, Jewelz...I'm done lying. I want YOU. I--WANT--YOU!A burden has been lifted off his shoulders, he can finally say those words.
Julian looks like he's been hit with a stick made out of the hardest metal possible. He doesn't know what to say...he had been wanting to hear those words for so long.
Vernon
But...I know I'm too late.What?
Julian was not ready for that one either. He was kinda hoping something else would happen...VernonI realized a lot while I was gone, Julian and...you're the dude I want to...try this with...
(tries to find words; laughs slightly)
What*EVER* it is we have between us cause...
(looks into Julian's eyes)
I KNOW that we got something...I always have, I just...couldn't figure out what I was.
Julian puts his finger up signalling Vernon to stop which he does. Julian's face is just about as shocked as the viewer. After all this time? All this time? This fine ass man who he's wanted ACTUALLY wants HIM now? Something's gotta be wrong...
Julian
THIS--isn't--one of--those--day--dreams...is it?
Vernon
(smirks)
You daydream about me? That's cute, Jewelz...
Julian
Nope, it's not cause in my daydreams, we'd be kissing already.Vernon gets a sexy look on his face, all he had to do was ask. The door opens, breaking the moment between them...it's Z.
Z
You are NOW the...
(snaps twice)
"Sickning Diva of...
(serious)
I don't have TIME for this MESS tonight." If U Seekay each other on your own time, WE gotta be at the club before Big Sal eats all the corndogs I left for him...
Julian
What are the corndogs for?
Z
So he'll be distracted when I release my FRIGGIN FOG!
(like drill sergeant)
Move, move, move!
End of Scene.
Now that Vernon's revealed his feelings to Julian...what will happen next?
Send comments to twitter.com/boyfriendznew
Ep. 8, Scene 1 *Trials of A Drag Queen*
"Love me, hate me, say what cha what about me, but all of the boys and all of the girls, are begging to If U Seek Amy, love me, hate me but can't cha see what I see? All of the boys and all of the girls are begging to If U Seek Amy..."
Secrets-Interior-Dance Floor
"If U Seek Amy" by Britney Spears plays in the background. It's been a month since "Out of Left Field". Z is walking next to a rather hefty sized man who has an assistant with a big brown bag that he's holding. The assistant isn't speaking, just walking along side Big Sal. Julian and Terrance also happen to be in the club doing something near the corner.
Z
So, I need the strobe lights hung up over HERE...
(points somewhere on the ceiling)
Theeee fog machine over here...
Big Sal
(eating a corndog; deep Russian accent)
I already told you, baaa-byyyy...NO--FRIGGIN FOG!
Z
Sal! This is my PRE-birthday show, Zaynah hasn't graced the crowd with her...
(snaps)
Sickning appearance in a minute, I gotta show these girls how to put on a show which means I gotta BRING IT, honey!
(snaps; than pouts)
And plus it's not fair that you give all these other hot messes bookings every other night but the most...
(snaps twice)
Sickning "Goddess of Entertainment" has to jump through hurdles JUST to get some damn fog...
Big Sal
(still eating)
Baaaa-byyy, don't make me repeat self. I told you...
(takes a big bite of the corndog)
NO--FRIGGIN' FOG!
Big Sal walks away with his assistant, still eating.
Z goes over to Julian and Terrance.
Z
And how are WE doing on dance central command, you sickning...
(snaps)
"Diva of Choreography"?
Julian raises his eyebrows like "not good" while Terrance looks like he's been struggling with the dance routine Julian has been trying to teach him for the past, ohhhh two hours? However...Terrance thinks he's doing a really good job.
Terrance
(confident)
I ALLLMOST...
(does a series of crazy looking dance moves)
Got it!
(spins)
Right boo?
Julian looks at him, he's so cute and he can't bear to tell him the truth.
Julian
(trying to find a word)
You were something else, baby, deeeefinitely something else--NOT of this world.
Terrance
(smiles; thinking it's a compliment)
Anything for my little Hot Pocket! I know I'm not THAT good of a dancer but your friend needed my help and you know I can't turn you down when you...
(suggestively)
Do that thing you do.
Julian looks embarrassed in front of Z, that's supposed to be for the bedroom.
Terrance
Plus, wearing a suit all day, youuu don't really get time to Shake Ya Pom Pom like Missy but...(does some more crazy moves)
I works it outttt!Julian kisses him, he's so cute and silly, just pure perfection.
Terrance
I'ma get summin to sippy sip on, take me one of those "fives" you DANCERS be talking bout. I don't see why you guys take so many breaks, babe, dancing's not THAT hard!
Terrance is out of breath like he's been working hard but in reality, he doesn't know any of the dance and just thinks he's doing so well. He walks off to the bar. Z is looking at Julian crazily.
Z
Now I LOVE--the sickning "Savior of the day slash vice president" of...
(snaps again)
DANCE command central but...
Z looks back at Terrance, who smiles at him and Z, takes a drink of his water and wipes his forehead like "damn, I'm worn out."
Z
Terrance must be sippin on that sizzzurp if he think he got the routine down.
(under his breath)
What the HELL was that indian rain dance he was doing? I thought he was trying to...
Z mimics the crazy moves that Terrance was doing.
Z
Summon the power of the water Gods and make the sprinklers go off, mary! We NEED another dancer.
Julian
I know, I know, and I've been trying, Z! Terrance just has three left feet.
Z
(confused)
THREE--left feet? Don't you mean two left...
Julian
(cutting him off)
No, mary, THREE--left feet. Yes, my boyfriend sucks THAT bad! But...
(smiles; looking at Terrance's body)
He makes up for that in every, other way possible...
(shaking his head)
I don't know how much longer I can refrain from...
(hears the song playing in the background)
"If U Seek A-ing" him.
Z
We don't have TIME to be worrying about YOUR sex life. We ALL know you been waiting to jump the boy's bones for the past month now so just do it already!
(grabs Julian's shoulders)
It's ooook, he's your boyfriend, it's NOTTTT slutty or whorish to...
(sings "The Business" by Yung Berg & Casha)
"Give him the business, give the business, give him the business, you give him the business!"
Julian puts a hand up, his face screaming "ohhh no". Z gives him a look and than stops singing thought he hits Z hard in the arm.
Z
The show is tonight, Julian, what are we gonna do, girl?! Where are we gonna find another dancer?!
Julian
(rubbing his arm; shocked)
Why did you hit me?!
Z
Because you made me waste a precious TWO minutes of brain activity on that little rant about you being a ridiculous celibacy! I could have USED that time more wisely, to figure out how I'ma EXPLAIN to Big Sal that I'm...
Terrance is dancing to the music, very off beat by the bar. He's really into it which is why it's pretty sad. Z has a "that's a shame" look on his face.
Z
(shaking his head)
Using a child from the special school as one of my dancers cause that's the ONLY thing that will explain why that poor boy moves the way he does.
"Amnesia" by Britney Spears begins to play.
"I forgot my name, I forgot my telephone number, if he wanna see me, he don't even know it, I forgot my address. Damsel in distress. I forgot my boyfriend was the one that had brought me this rockkk. I get amnesia when I'm standing next to you-oh-oh..."
Someone walks into the club...it's Vernon! He has a bookbag on his shoulder, his hair is in tied down in a durag and he spots Julian. Julian sees Vernon as well, what is he doing here? They've been keeping in touch but haven't really been seeing each other a lot since Julian got serious with Terrance and Vernon lost his job. Not having seen his friend in a while, Julian goes up to him and hugs Vernon happily, Vernon this time, has no problem hugging Julian back.
End of Scene.
Why do you think Vernon is back?
Send comments to twitter.com/boyfriendznews
Secrets-Interior-Dance Floor
"If U Seek Amy" by Britney Spears plays in the background. It's been a month since "Out of Left Field". Z is walking next to a rather hefty sized man who has an assistant with a big brown bag that he's holding. The assistant isn't speaking, just walking along side Big Sal. Julian and Terrance also happen to be in the club doing something near the corner.
Z
So, I need the strobe lights hung up over HERE...
(points somewhere on the ceiling)
Theeee fog machine over here...
Big Sal
(eating a corndog; deep Russian accent)
I already told you, baaa-byyyy...NO--FRIGGIN FOG!
Z
Sal! This is my PRE-birthday show, Zaynah hasn't graced the crowd with her...
(snaps)
Sickning appearance in a minute, I gotta show these girls how to put on a show which means I gotta BRING IT, honey!
(snaps; than pouts)
And plus it's not fair that you give all these other hot messes bookings every other night but the most...
(snaps twice)
Sickning "Goddess of Entertainment" has to jump through hurdles JUST to get some damn fog...
Big Sal
(still eating)
Baaaa-byyy, don't make me repeat self. I told you...
(takes a big bite of the corndog)
NO--FRIGGIN' FOG!
Big Sal walks away with his assistant, still eating.
Z goes over to Julian and Terrance.
Z
And how are WE doing on dance central command, you sickning...
(snaps)
"Diva of Choreography"?
Julian raises his eyebrows like "not good" while Terrance looks like he's been struggling with the dance routine Julian has been trying to teach him for the past, ohhhh two hours? However...Terrance thinks he's doing a really good job.
Terrance
(confident)
I ALLLMOST...
(does a series of crazy looking dance moves)
Got it!
(spins)
Right boo?
Julian looks at him, he's so cute and he can't bear to tell him the truth.
Julian
(trying to find a word)
You were something else, baby, deeeefinitely something else--NOT of this world.
Terrance
(smiles; thinking it's a compliment)
Anything for my little Hot Pocket! I know I'm not THAT good of a dancer but your friend needed my help and you know I can't turn you down when you...
(suggestively)
Do that thing you do.
Julian looks embarrassed in front of Z, that's supposed to be for the bedroom.
Terrance
Plus, wearing a suit all day, youuu don't really get time to Shake Ya Pom Pom like Missy but...(does some more crazy moves)
I works it outttt!Julian kisses him, he's so cute and silly, just pure perfection.
Terrance
I'ma get summin to sippy sip on, take me one of those "fives" you DANCERS be talking bout. I don't see why you guys take so many breaks, babe, dancing's not THAT hard!
Terrance is out of breath like he's been working hard but in reality, he doesn't know any of the dance and just thinks he's doing so well. He walks off to the bar. Z is looking at Julian crazily.
Z
Now I LOVE--the sickning "Savior of the day slash vice president" of...
(snaps again)
DANCE command central but...
Z looks back at Terrance, who smiles at him and Z, takes a drink of his water and wipes his forehead like "damn, I'm worn out."
Z
Terrance must be sippin on that sizzzurp if he think he got the routine down.
(under his breath)
What the HELL was that indian rain dance he was doing? I thought he was trying to...
Z mimics the crazy moves that Terrance was doing.
Z
Summon the power of the water Gods and make the sprinklers go off, mary! We NEED another dancer.
Julian
I know, I know, and I've been trying, Z! Terrance just has three left feet.
Z
(confused)
THREE--left feet? Don't you mean two left...
Julian
(cutting him off)
No, mary, THREE--left feet. Yes, my boyfriend sucks THAT bad! But...
(smiles; looking at Terrance's body)
He makes up for that in every, other way possible...
(shaking his head)
I don't know how much longer I can refrain from...
(hears the song playing in the background)
"If U Seek A-ing" him.
Z
We don't have TIME to be worrying about YOUR sex life. We ALL know you been waiting to jump the boy's bones for the past month now so just do it already!
(grabs Julian's shoulders)
It's ooook, he's your boyfriend, it's NOTTTT slutty or whorish to...
(sings "The Business" by Yung Berg & Casha)
"Give him the business, give the business, give him the business, you give him the business!"
Julian puts a hand up, his face screaming "ohhh no". Z gives him a look and than stops singing thought he hits Z hard in the arm.
Z
The show is tonight, Julian, what are we gonna do, girl?! Where are we gonna find another dancer?!
Julian
(rubbing his arm; shocked)
Why did you hit me?!
Z
Because you made me waste a precious TWO minutes of brain activity on that little rant about you being a ridiculous celibacy! I could have USED that time more wisely, to figure out how I'ma EXPLAIN to Big Sal that I'm...
Terrance is dancing to the music, very off beat by the bar. He's really into it which is why it's pretty sad. Z has a "that's a shame" look on his face.
Z
(shaking his head)
Using a child from the special school as one of my dancers cause that's the ONLY thing that will explain why that poor boy moves the way he does.
"Amnesia" by Britney Spears begins to play.
"I forgot my name, I forgot my telephone number, if he wanna see me, he don't even know it, I forgot my address. Damsel in distress. I forgot my boyfriend was the one that had brought me this rockkk. I get amnesia when I'm standing next to you-oh-oh..."
Someone walks into the club...it's Vernon! He has a bookbag on his shoulder, his hair is in tied down in a durag and he spots Julian. Julian sees Vernon as well, what is he doing here? They've been keeping in touch but haven't really been seeing each other a lot since Julian got serious with Terrance and Vernon lost his job. Not having seen his friend in a while, Julian goes up to him and hugs Vernon happily, Vernon this time, has no problem hugging Julian back.
End of Scene.
Why do you think Vernon is back?
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Julian's Thoughts (Ep 7)
So it all came out in the open, Vernon--he's possibly gay And I still really don't know how to digest that.
TEQUILA is death people! It made Stony spill like Niagra Falls, on everyone! He told my boyfriend that he's a rebound and he's really not...I thought...he may have been too for a few minutes but I realized that I can't live in the past. Or the what ifs. Vernon is the guy of my dreams, the MAN of my dreams and I wish that...nothing. I don't wish anything because I have Terrence, who knows what he wants and that's me :).
Darnell...is a little bit of a mess as usual. Dating Malik, the competition, but he will never admit to it. And the guy is playing him lovely and Darnell's just kind of--taking it. I've never seen that before.
It was funny to see Z and Darnell working together to "protect" me all this time though. They've known about Vernon and "the gay porn secret from hell" for a long time and didn't tell me...thanks Stony.
Good day!
TEQUILA is death people! It made Stony spill like Niagra Falls, on everyone! He told my boyfriend that he's a rebound and he's really not...I thought...he may have been too for a few minutes but I realized that I can't live in the past. Or the what ifs. Vernon is the guy of my dreams, the MAN of my dreams and I wish that...nothing. I don't wish anything because I have Terrence, who knows what he wants and that's me :).
Darnell...is a little bit of a mess as usual. Dating Malik, the competition, but he will never admit to it. And the guy is playing him lovely and Darnell's just kind of--taking it. I've never seen that before.
It was funny to see Z and Darnell working together to "protect" me all this time though. They've known about Vernon and "the gay porn secret from hell" for a long time and didn't tell me...thanks Stony.
Good day!
*Tequila Aftermath* Scene 6 & 7, Ep 7
Scene 6
"Cause we be--longgggg, togeeee-ther, now, yeaaaa! Forever uniiiii-ted, herrrrre some--howww, yeaaa! You got a pieeeeece of me! Anddd honnnnestly! My life! My life! Would suck! Would suck! Withouuuut youuuu!
Lisa's-Interior-Table
"My Life Would Suck Without You" by Kelly Clarkson plays in the background. Z, Stony, and Julian are at a table and Darnell comes in, sitting down next to Julian.
Darnell
Ok, I'm here, let's get this over with, who wants to fight me first?
Z
Nobody wants to fight you, Leyla Ali, stop acting like you gangsta.
Darnell
(sighs; looking at Julian)
I've been thinking and I didn't do ANYTHINg wrong. I thought I was doing a good thing as a friend by not telling you that I interviewed Vernon's ex-girlfriend and she told me that she found gay porn in his computer.
Julian
(shocked)
Gay porn? Vernon HAS gay porn?
Darnell
Just a couple of those really hood boy titles, Pitbull Productions, Tiger Tyson, Supreme, you know, all my homeboys.
Z
And when I hung out with him that day at the "Breaker Breaker" place...I did get a really big, "homo" sexual vibe from him.
Darnell
And we didn't wanna tell you all this cause--we remembered how hurt you were when you THOUGHT that Vernon was completely straight after he RUDELY showed you how he straight he was when he had sex on top of your head!
Stony
In Vernon's defense, he didn't know that criminal number one and criminal number two were even there.
Z
(to Stony)
Criminal number one's about to commit crime number two if you keep giving all these other boys compliments.
(to Julian)
Julian...when you first met Vernon we all saw where it was going, YOU saw where it was going and than you got hurt--but you picked yourself back up. And, you even got your "friend"...
(to Stony; under his breath)
Although, we ALL know he will never be JUST a friend...
Julian
I'm SITTING right here! Talk to me! You guys HAVE to stop treating me like I'm a baby, I can walk on my own two feet and deal with big, scary gay world. Now yeah, Vernon could be gay, that's great! And in the past, MAYBE I COULD have been with him but I have a guy in my life NOW--that I care about and who--puts up with all of my weird, odd, awkward tendencies and...
Julian looks at the charm bracelet Terrance gave him, wow, he really DOES have feelings for him.
Julian
(coming to a conclusion)
And he deserves to know that he's not a rebound. Terrance is not a rebound.
Stony
I'm sorry, mary, you know how Tequila makes me loose like it's the goose...if you're happy with Terrance, than I'm happy for you.
Z
We ALL are.
Darnell
(smiling)
But me, MOST. Just cause I wanna be better than them.
Julian smiles, thankful that he and his friends can still get along after a fight like the one they had.
Julian
Can you guys all promise me that from now on that's how it'll be? No more secrets between us?
Z/Darnell/StonyAgreed.
Z
And since we're being all truthful...
(to Darnell)
How come you didn't tell me about Kasey putting his nasty, crusty lips on my husband earlier?!
Darnell
Cause! As much as I DON'T like you and think that Stony can do ten times better? I don't know...I feel like we've--bonded more in the work place.Z is actually touched by that.
Julian
Awww, so you were trying to protect his feelings, Darnelllll, you're growing.
Darnell
Growing? I just didn't wanna have my name in a scandal! cause I KNEW if I told her, she would end up having to take off from work for her court dates and I don't want no temp messes up my good dysfunction!
They all laugh, knowing that Darnell is playing.
Scene 7
"Ya changed my wholeee liii-iii-iife. Don't know whatcha doiiiing to meeee, with your lovvvee. I'm feeling all superhuman, you did that to me, super human heart lives in me, no-thing can stop me here with youuuu. Super humannnn, feel so, su-per, hu-man..."
The Park-Pond
"Superhuman" by Chris Brown and Keri Hilson plays in the background. Julian is sitting on a bench, looking out at the water, throwing rocks into it. He's thinking about his life and far he's come but...Vernon's still on his mind. However, he knows that what's meant to be is meant to be and unfortunately doesn't fall into that category. Terrance suddenly walks over to him, having found him finally.
Terrance
Hey, this seat taken?
Julian looks over, happy and surprised to see Terrance.
Julian
(nicely)
It's a public park, I don't see why not.
Terrance sits down, picking up rocks and throwing them into the pond.
Terrance
(paused)
I was engaged.
Julian looks surprised by that.
Julian
Really? I--I didn't know.
Terrance
Cause I don't talk about it much.
Julian
(sighs)
Painful memories. What happened?
TerranceBout a year a go he bounced on me for his ex, broke off our engagement and headed straight to the ATL. Never looked back.
Julian feels horrible for Terrance, he rubs his shoulder comfortingly.
Terrance
You wanted to know WHY I was so upset about your reaction to finding out about Vernon...it's because...I think you could be something special for me. And I'll be damned if anyone takes that away from me. Especially a chump who had his chance at greatness and let it go for WHATEVER the reason.
Julian smiles, he's never been someone's something special before and it feels good to have Terrance be the one to tell him those words.
Julian
I was telling my friends...in another life, in another place...I would have jumped at the chance to run back and find out what WOULD have happened with Vernon but...
(touches Terrance's face)
Not today. Not THIS Julian.
Terrance puts his arm around Julian and Julian lays his head on Terrance's chest. Terrance got his boo officially and he feels that now, he couldn't be a happier man.
Terrance
Oh word? So you just like Sasha Fiercy, huh?
(talking out to the water)
My boo got two different sides to him, he tryna be like Beyonce, can we sayyyy, biter?
Julian
(hits him on the chest)
You so silly, boy, I swear.
Terrance
(acting cool)
So, I'm just--you know, a little curious about um, what THIS Julian's going to do? The one that's living for today, what's he gonna do?
(poking Julian playfully in the stomach)
You got me anxious with that little diatribe you had going on there...
Julian
(laughing; trying to stop him)
THIS Julian...
(holds Terrance's hand; interlocks their fingers)
IS going to run...
Terrance smirks, waiting for him to finish.
JulianBut he's going to run to Terrance. The man who he knows wants to give him everything that I want to give him. That is until you start getting comfortable and wanting to show yo ass, than I'ma have to borrow Z's bat and regulate.
Terrance laughs and they kiss lightly, finally feeling like a real couple. Julian throws another rock in the water and it bounces off of a "log". Suddenly, Terrance and Julian's heads tilt to the side, are they seeing right?
Julian
(slowly)
Now, I watch the Discovery Channel sometimes and they say that alligators sometimes resemble logs.
Terrance
(scared)
Uh huh.
Julian
I'm trying to figure out if those are eyes or rocks...
Terrance
(getting up slowly)
I'm still trying to figure out why we still sitting here...They hear a growl...yup, it's not a log.
Terrance
Baby, I think we should...
Terrance looks over but doesn't see Julian there. He turns to the other side and sees Julian hauling ass.
End of Episode.
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"Cause we be--longgggg, togeeee-ther, now, yeaaaa! Forever uniiiii-ted, herrrrre some--howww, yeaaa! You got a pieeeeece of me! Anddd honnnnestly! My life! My life! Would suck! Would suck! Withouuuut youuuu!
Lisa's-Interior-Table
"My Life Would Suck Without You" by Kelly Clarkson plays in the background. Z, Stony, and Julian are at a table and Darnell comes in, sitting down next to Julian.
Darnell
Ok, I'm here, let's get this over with, who wants to fight me first?
Z
Nobody wants to fight you, Leyla Ali, stop acting like you gangsta.
Darnell
(sighs; looking at Julian)
I've been thinking and I didn't do ANYTHINg wrong. I thought I was doing a good thing as a friend by not telling you that I interviewed Vernon's ex-girlfriend and she told me that she found gay porn in his computer.
Julian
(shocked)
Gay porn? Vernon HAS gay porn?
Darnell
Just a couple of those really hood boy titles, Pitbull Productions, Tiger Tyson, Supreme, you know, all my homeboys.
Z
And when I hung out with him that day at the "Breaker Breaker" place...I did get a really big, "homo" sexual vibe from him.
Darnell
And we didn't wanna tell you all this cause--we remembered how hurt you were when you THOUGHT that Vernon was completely straight after he RUDELY showed you how he straight he was when he had sex on top of your head!
Stony
In Vernon's defense, he didn't know that criminal number one and criminal number two were even there.
Z
(to Stony)
Criminal number one's about to commit crime number two if you keep giving all these other boys compliments.
(to Julian)
Julian...when you first met Vernon we all saw where it was going, YOU saw where it was going and than you got hurt--but you picked yourself back up. And, you even got your "friend"...
(to Stony; under his breath)
Although, we ALL know he will never be JUST a friend...
Julian
I'm SITTING right here! Talk to me! You guys HAVE to stop treating me like I'm a baby, I can walk on my own two feet and deal with big, scary gay world. Now yeah, Vernon could be gay, that's great! And in the past, MAYBE I COULD have been with him but I have a guy in my life NOW--that I care about and who--puts up with all of my weird, odd, awkward tendencies and...
Julian looks at the charm bracelet Terrance gave him, wow, he really DOES have feelings for him.
Julian
(coming to a conclusion)
And he deserves to know that he's not a rebound. Terrance is not a rebound.
Stony
I'm sorry, mary, you know how Tequila makes me loose like it's the goose...if you're happy with Terrance, than I'm happy for you.
Z
We ALL are.
Darnell
(smiling)
But me, MOST. Just cause I wanna be better than them.
Julian smiles, thankful that he and his friends can still get along after a fight like the one they had.
Julian
Can you guys all promise me that from now on that's how it'll be? No more secrets between us?
Z/Darnell/StonyAgreed.
Z
And since we're being all truthful...
(to Darnell)
How come you didn't tell me about Kasey putting his nasty, crusty lips on my husband earlier?!
Darnell
Cause! As much as I DON'T like you and think that Stony can do ten times better? I don't know...I feel like we've--bonded more in the work place.Z is actually touched by that.
Julian
Awww, so you were trying to protect his feelings, Darnelllll, you're growing.
Darnell
Growing? I just didn't wanna have my name in a scandal! cause I KNEW if I told her, she would end up having to take off from work for her court dates and I don't want no temp messes up my good dysfunction!
They all laugh, knowing that Darnell is playing.
Scene 7
"Ya changed my wholeee liii-iii-iife. Don't know whatcha doiiiing to meeee, with your lovvvee. I'm feeling all superhuman, you did that to me, super human heart lives in me, no-thing can stop me here with youuuu. Super humannnn, feel so, su-per, hu-man..."
The Park-Pond
"Superhuman" by Chris Brown and Keri Hilson plays in the background. Julian is sitting on a bench, looking out at the water, throwing rocks into it. He's thinking about his life and far he's come but...Vernon's still on his mind. However, he knows that what's meant to be is meant to be and unfortunately doesn't fall into that category. Terrance suddenly walks over to him, having found him finally.
Terrance
Hey, this seat taken?
Julian looks over, happy and surprised to see Terrance.
Julian
(nicely)
It's a public park, I don't see why not.
Terrance sits down, picking up rocks and throwing them into the pond.
Terrance
(paused)
I was engaged.
Julian looks surprised by that.
Julian
Really? I--I didn't know.
Terrance
Cause I don't talk about it much.
Julian
(sighs)
Painful memories. What happened?
TerranceBout a year a go he bounced on me for his ex, broke off our engagement and headed straight to the ATL. Never looked back.
Julian feels horrible for Terrance, he rubs his shoulder comfortingly.
Terrance
You wanted to know WHY I was so upset about your reaction to finding out about Vernon...it's because...I think you could be something special for me. And I'll be damned if anyone takes that away from me. Especially a chump who had his chance at greatness and let it go for WHATEVER the reason.
Julian smiles, he's never been someone's something special before and it feels good to have Terrance be the one to tell him those words.
Julian
I was telling my friends...in another life, in another place...I would have jumped at the chance to run back and find out what WOULD have happened with Vernon but...
(touches Terrance's face)
Not today. Not THIS Julian.
Terrance puts his arm around Julian and Julian lays his head on Terrance's chest. Terrance got his boo officially and he feels that now, he couldn't be a happier man.
Terrance
Oh word? So you just like Sasha Fiercy, huh?
(talking out to the water)
My boo got two different sides to him, he tryna be like Beyonce, can we sayyyy, biter?
Julian
(hits him on the chest)
You so silly, boy, I swear.
Terrance
(acting cool)
So, I'm just--you know, a little curious about um, what THIS Julian's going to do? The one that's living for today, what's he gonna do?
(poking Julian playfully in the stomach)
You got me anxious with that little diatribe you had going on there...
Julian
(laughing; trying to stop him)
THIS Julian...
(holds Terrance's hand; interlocks their fingers)
IS going to run...
Terrance smirks, waiting for him to finish.
JulianBut he's going to run to Terrance. The man who he knows wants to give him everything that I want to give him. That is until you start getting comfortable and wanting to show yo ass, than I'ma have to borrow Z's bat and regulate.
Terrance laughs and they kiss lightly, finally feeling like a real couple. Julian throws another rock in the water and it bounces off of a "log". Suddenly, Terrance and Julian's heads tilt to the side, are they seeing right?
Julian
(slowly)
Now, I watch the Discovery Channel sometimes and they say that alligators sometimes resemble logs.
Terrance
(scared)
Uh huh.
Julian
I'm trying to figure out if those are eyes or rocks...
Terrance
(getting up slowly)
I'm still trying to figure out why we still sitting here...They hear a growl...yup, it's not a log.
Terrance
Baby, I think we should...
Terrance looks over but doesn't see Julian there. He turns to the other side and sees Julian hauling ass.
End of Episode.
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Friday, September 11, 2009
Z's Journal Entry *AfterMath* Ep.7
I am still in shock...I didn't even think I would end up like one of those dumb bitches on Tyra..no damn, Tyra, one of those dumb bitches on Maury! Stony cheated on me1 He cheated on me! With Kasey! The security guard that I KNEW was up to something! Ugh, I don't know who to kill first if Kasey couldn't get me kicked out of here I would so go into that community room right now and do some community service!
And poor Julian, not only did Stony ruin our relationship but he ruined Julian's with Terrence! Telling that poor he was a rebound? Julina and Terrence are really good together and I LOVE that he's happy but now that he knows about Vernon and the "gay" possibilities? I don't know if it's made things worse for them, Terrence is a really nice guy...
And than this trick ass, smut, ass giving away Darnell, I had to give it to him sickeningly! He knew all this time about Stony and didn't tell me!...I guess it could be karma for me keeping things from Julian...I don't know what to do, going to cry myself to sleep.
And poor Julian, not only did Stony ruin our relationship but he ruined Julian's with Terrence! Telling that poor he was a rebound? Julina and Terrence are really good together and I LOVE that he's happy but now that he knows about Vernon and the "gay" possibilities? I don't know if it's made things worse for them, Terrence is a really nice guy...
And than this trick ass, smut, ass giving away Darnell, I had to give it to him sickeningly! He knew all this time about Stony and didn't tell me!...I guess it could be karma for me keeping things from Julian...I don't know what to do, going to cry myself to sleep.
*Tequila & Guilt Don't Mix Pt.2*, Scene 2
Scene 2
Continuation from previous scene"If that boy don't love you by nowwww, he will never ever, never ever love you, he will never ever, never ever love you, ohhh..."
Stony/Z's Apartment-Interior-Living Room
"Never Ever" by Ciara plays in the background. Stony has just told Terrance that Julian is using him as a rebound...from who you ask? Darnell and Z don't, they know what Stony's talking about.
Z
Baby, you've been putting them back like Tara Reid, if you had boobs the paparrazi would be all over ya, I think it's time you go to bed.
Z starts to move Stony because he doesn't want him to run his mouth anymore.
Julian
Wait, wait. I wanna hear this.
Darnell
And so do I.
Stony
Vernon! These two, keep shut bitches over here didn't wanna tell you that ya man COULDA been ya man cause they didn't want you to get hurt and you fell into Terrance's silly ass grinning's face, you are ALWAYS smiling what the hell is THAT about?
Terrance is no longer smiling and puts his arm around Julian, protectively. Stony's drunk, Julian's his boo but...what's he talking bout "rebound"?
Julian
(confused)
Vernon? Are you talking about Vernon?
Julian may have been a little tipsy but he was sober enough to understand what Darnell meant. Vernon could have been his man?
Julian
Stony, you HAVE been drinking a lot and trust me, I KNOW how it is, when you're drunk you say and do outrageous stuff, um...
(raises hand)
Pee on the wall incident a couple of Tequila nights ago? Guilty. So I know that you're just...
Stony
I'm not just NOTHING, Vernon likes boys! He likes the boys hunnay, he likes the boys!
(raises his hands in the air like "Thank God it's out)
Oh my God somebody needs to it finally! THIS...
(points at Julian and Terrance)
Is not right...
(to Terrance)
No offense to you, you're wonderful, GREAT taste in clothes too but...
(to Julian)
You belong with...
Darnell
(puts a finger up to stop Stony)
Don't you DARE, Stony! I'm warning you, do NOT--say anything about...
Stony
About who? Vernon? The store clerk? The boy that Julian wants to death and who want him back but don't wanna tell this boy cause they scared he might get his heart hurt? LET him BE happy!
Julian is starting to sober up more now and his old fantasies of Vernon being gay and being with him start to resurface.
Julian
(looking at Darnell & Z)
WHAT is HE talking about? SOMEBODY better start talking otherwise
(holds stomach)
I'ma paint the town all types of colors when I upchuck cause my nerves are shot!
Z's been wanting to say something for a long time and finally feels that he can get it out.
Z
Ok, ok! I confess! Me and Darnell found out that Vernon COULD have possibly been into you BUT we didn't TELL you because we thought that you had already been hurt enough by the mixed signals and whatnot...
(hands him fake money)
Money?
Julian's head is spinning...the word rebound...Vernon LIKED him?...no, this wasn't happening. Terrance was here and that's all that mattered. But they knew.
Julian
You guys knew? And you didn't tell me? I could have been with Vernon and you DIDN'T tell me?!
Terrance looks hurt by that but Julian doesn't notice.
Z
Darnell swore me to secrecy! You know how good he is at putting subliminal messages in people's heads, he's down with the "get down", girl.
Julian looks at Darnell like "how dare you?". Terrance sees that Julian is getting upset and sits up, moving his arm from around Julian.
Darnell
Don't look at me like that, I did it to help you! Vernon wasn't good for you!
Stony
Oh, if you lie anymore your nose is gonna be the size of a seven foot tall basketball player's penis at seven in the morning, ya did it cause you was jealous that Julian was actually gonna be with somebody and YOU were gonna be the odd one out this time, ohhh, you just so...
(shaking his head)
So trife, mary, ohhhh, a mess...
Darnell
Oh, I'm a mess but YOU the one kissing security guards behind your wife's back?
Everyone's mouth drops at that bit of information, especially Stony.
Z
(shocked)
What?!
(mad)
Darnell, DON'T be trying to mess up my happy home just cause YOU can't deal with the fact that you met a man whose better at playing the game than you are, we ALL know that "business" Malik is outside on the phone with? Is the next trick he's "playing board games" with and it's pissing--you--off but you DON'T wanna say anything. And DON'T tell me I'm lying cause ya told Julian that you found the text messages in his phone and Julian told ME, YES the gay chain works BOTH ways--honey!
Stony
You left before that even happened, mary...
Stony covers his mouth with his hand, SHIT! Z's eyes widen, he can't believe it's true! Julian looks like he's about to be sick, his mind is racing with the what ifs, what could have beens, his bestfriends boyfriend is cheating on him? The thought that messed his stomach up even more is that he could have had Vernon if he just said something. Terrance doesn't know how to feel, is what Julian's friends say true? Is Julian just using him? Terrance sees that Julian doesn't look too well.
Terrance
You don't look too good, let's um...
(sighs)
Let's get out of here.
Julian stands up and his face looks like he's about to puke.
Julian
(holding back vomit)
Aw damn! The bouncy, bouncy juice got me!
Julian runs to the bathroom.
Is Z going to kill Stony?
Is Malik really playing Darnell out?
Do you think Terrence and Julian will survive this?
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Continuation from previous scene"If that boy don't love you by nowwww, he will never ever, never ever love you, he will never ever, never ever love you, ohhh..."
Stony/Z's Apartment-Interior-Living Room
"Never Ever" by Ciara plays in the background. Stony has just told Terrance that Julian is using him as a rebound...from who you ask? Darnell and Z don't, they know what Stony's talking about.
Z
Baby, you've been putting them back like Tara Reid, if you had boobs the paparrazi would be all over ya, I think it's time you go to bed.
Z starts to move Stony because he doesn't want him to run his mouth anymore.
Julian
Wait, wait. I wanna hear this.
Darnell
And so do I.
Stony
Vernon! These two, keep shut bitches over here didn't wanna tell you that ya man COULDA been ya man cause they didn't want you to get hurt and you fell into Terrance's silly ass grinning's face, you are ALWAYS smiling what the hell is THAT about?
Terrance is no longer smiling and puts his arm around Julian, protectively. Stony's drunk, Julian's his boo but...what's he talking bout "rebound"?
Julian
(confused)
Vernon? Are you talking about Vernon?
Julian may have been a little tipsy but he was sober enough to understand what Darnell meant. Vernon could have been his man?
Julian
Stony, you HAVE been drinking a lot and trust me, I KNOW how it is, when you're drunk you say and do outrageous stuff, um...
(raises hand)
Pee on the wall incident a couple of Tequila nights ago? Guilty. So I know that you're just...
Stony
I'm not just NOTHING, Vernon likes boys! He likes the boys hunnay, he likes the boys!
(raises his hands in the air like "Thank God it's out)
Oh my God somebody needs to it finally! THIS...
(points at Julian and Terrance)
Is not right...
(to Terrance)
No offense to you, you're wonderful, GREAT taste in clothes too but...
(to Julian)
You belong with...
Darnell
(puts a finger up to stop Stony)
Don't you DARE, Stony! I'm warning you, do NOT--say anything about...
Stony
About who? Vernon? The store clerk? The boy that Julian wants to death and who want him back but don't wanna tell this boy cause they scared he might get his heart hurt? LET him BE happy!
Julian is starting to sober up more now and his old fantasies of Vernon being gay and being with him start to resurface.
Julian
(looking at Darnell & Z)
WHAT is HE talking about? SOMEBODY better start talking otherwise
(holds stomach)
I'ma paint the town all types of colors when I upchuck cause my nerves are shot!
Z's been wanting to say something for a long time and finally feels that he can get it out.
Z
Ok, ok! I confess! Me and Darnell found out that Vernon COULD have possibly been into you BUT we didn't TELL you because we thought that you had already been hurt enough by the mixed signals and whatnot...
(hands him fake money)
Money?
Julian's head is spinning...the word rebound...Vernon LIKED him?...no, this wasn't happening. Terrance was here and that's all that mattered. But they knew.
Julian
You guys knew? And you didn't tell me? I could have been with Vernon and you DIDN'T tell me?!
Terrance looks hurt by that but Julian doesn't notice.
Z
Darnell swore me to secrecy! You know how good he is at putting subliminal messages in people's heads, he's down with the "get down", girl.
Julian looks at Darnell like "how dare you?". Terrance sees that Julian is getting upset and sits up, moving his arm from around Julian.
Darnell
Don't look at me like that, I did it to help you! Vernon wasn't good for you!
Stony
Oh, if you lie anymore your nose is gonna be the size of a seven foot tall basketball player's penis at seven in the morning, ya did it cause you was jealous that Julian was actually gonna be with somebody and YOU were gonna be the odd one out this time, ohhh, you just so...
(shaking his head)
So trife, mary, ohhhh, a mess...
Darnell
Oh, I'm a mess but YOU the one kissing security guards behind your wife's back?
Everyone's mouth drops at that bit of information, especially Stony.
Z
(shocked)
What?!
(mad)
Darnell, DON'T be trying to mess up my happy home just cause YOU can't deal with the fact that you met a man whose better at playing the game than you are, we ALL know that "business" Malik is outside on the phone with? Is the next trick he's "playing board games" with and it's pissing--you--off but you DON'T wanna say anything. And DON'T tell me I'm lying cause ya told Julian that you found the text messages in his phone and Julian told ME, YES the gay chain works BOTH ways--honey!
Stony
You left before that even happened, mary...
Stony covers his mouth with his hand, SHIT! Z's eyes widen, he can't believe it's true! Julian looks like he's about to be sick, his mind is racing with the what ifs, what could have beens, his bestfriends boyfriend is cheating on him? The thought that messed his stomach up even more is that he could have had Vernon if he just said something. Terrance doesn't know how to feel, is what Julian's friends say true? Is Julian just using him? Terrance sees that Julian doesn't look too well.
Terrance
You don't look too good, let's um...
(sighs)
Let's get out of here.
Julian stands up and his face looks like he's about to puke.
Julian
(holding back vomit)
Aw damn! The bouncy, bouncy juice got me!
Julian runs to the bathroom.
Is Z going to kill Stony?
Is Malik really playing Darnell out?
Do you think Terrence and Julian will survive this?
SEND COMMENTS TO TWITTER.COM/BOYFRIENDZNEWS
*Tequila And Guilt Don't Mix* Ep. 7, Scene 1
Scene 1
Z/Stony's Apartment-Interior-Living Room"I'll be ya entertainmetn tonight, I show you whatever it is ya like, just sit back and enjoy the show, kick ya feet up boy here we go..."
"Control Me" by Keri Hilson plays in the background. The "Boyfriendz" along with Terrance and Malik are sitting down, playing "Monopoly". Stony and Z are sitting on a couch with Terrance and Julian while Darnell is sitting on the loveseat with Malik. There's a bottle of Tequila on the table as well as the board game and they all look a little sloshed except Z, whose perfectly sober.
Darnell
(excited)
Bitch, pay me! AND--take a shot. Well, Stony might as well get ready for a biopsy NOW cause messing with you, he gonna have liver disease since he's been taking your shots all night.
Malik
(to Darnell)
I think you gotta pay ME, you still owe me from that loan I gave you.
DarnellAnd you still owe me for those four HOURS I gave you of undeniable pleasure this morning, get it right boo.
(looks at Z)
Gimme my money.
Z looks like he doesn't wanna give Darnell the money and goes into his shirt to get the bills.
Z
Here...you slumlord...(points to the houses on board)Them houses are not even up to par anyway, look how close they are, I KNOW that's gotta be some kind of health hazard!
Stony takes the money from Z and hands it to Darnell, Malik snatches the money out of his hands.
Julian
(turns to Terrance; focused)
Baby, it's our turn, what should we do? Buy a hotel orrrr...roll again and try to by pass Darnell and Malik's strip so we can land on Free Parking cause I really want the money.
Terrance looks like he's into the game but just wants to make Julian happy and is chewing gum.
Terrance
Ight but babe, listen--if we do go for the money than we risking hitting allll those...(looks over at Darnell and Malik)
Erotic STD shops THOSE two built over there. I don't know about you but I want my first time finally getting THAT to be in a place a LIL bit classier so let's build a hotel, I'ma name it after you.
(plants a kiss on Julian)
Where's the stash, baby?
Julian
Rightttt...
Julian goes into a bucket and pulls out a pile of money. Julian is definitely a little drunk.
Julian
Here. It's sooo preeeety.
(makes a face)
Oops, almost had a lilll accident.
Terrance takes the money from Julian and hands it Stony. Julian rubs his stomach.
Julian
(somewhat drunk)
My tummy's hurt, I feel the CareBears when they drink that crazy juice that makes them bounce...
(points widely in the air)
Like this, like this, like this, like this...
(makes face)
Oops, there it goes again...
Terrace starts rubbing Julian's stomach looking sympathetic for his boo.
Terrance
(baby voice)
Awwww, my baby can't handle his liquor, that's sooo cute. That's so cute, that's so cute.
Julian
(laughing)
It's not gonna be cute when I earl over this Monopoly board, stoppp!
Stony
(drunk)
Yesss, please stop! Can ya'll just STOP being so damn cute?! Everybody wanna be cute, cute, cute and ya'll all just hiding stuff!
Darnell
(cocky)
Is the Tequila black hole talking to me? Somebody's mad cause they're the banker and...Point to Z and Stony's dwindling assets, they have little money and own a small corner on the board.
Darnell
YOU two bitches living on skid row!
Malik
That's right, baby, we got this board on lock. The return on operations that we got from the investment we put in about TWELVE moves ago has paid off significantly.
DarnellI know what you trying to do and spitting all that professional man talk in front of people is dangerous cause you know it gets me a little randy.
They snuggle a little bit, showing some affection for each other, it looks like Darnell sort of likes Malik somewhat. Malik's cellphone rings and Darnell sighs, pulling back like he knows what that means.
MalikI'm sorry baby, you know how clients are? I gotta take this.Malik gets up, going into the hallway, leaving the apartment.
Z
(to Darnell)
If you muzzle that man ONE more time! Girl,is there anything else to your relationship besides sex?!
(narrows eyes at Darnell)
And DON'T say you not in a relationship, you been seeing him constantly for almost two weeks now, I think it's time you hang up that hooker whore scorecard that you so desperately want to hang on to.
Julian
(to Terrance)
Baby, could you get me something to drink?
Terrance reaches for the bottle of Tequila.
Julian
(stopping him)
Something OTHER than--THAT evil juice. Nooooooo more evil juice. Ever. Ever. Ever.
Terrance
I got you, baby. One ginger ale coming right up and a...
Terrance puckers his lips and Julian kisses them, like something they do all the time.
Terrance
(winking cutely)
Baby kiss for my baby. That always fixes SOMETHING.
Julian
Hmmm, I feel better already.(in a sexy voice)If we wasn't in this house, in front of everybody...
Terrance gets excited, he's been wanting to sleep with Julian for awhile now but has been holding out and can't wait for the day when Julian decides to let him have that pleasure.
TerranceDamn the people, baby, I will get down with YOU anywhere, ANYTIME, you wanna go right now? Let's go right now.
Julian laughs and mushes him in the face playfully. Terrance gets up from the couch and goes to the kitchen. Stony's been looking at Terrance and Julian with a "I don't believe this bitch" look on his face. He's angry about everything that happened with Kaiseem and how it's affected his relationship with Z over the past weeks. The liquor is not making Stony's resentment with himself any better.
Z
(under his breath)
Baby, why are you looking at them like that? Like you wanna use your hidden x-ray vision powers to burn a whole through them!
(hears how that sounds; thinks)
X-ray is the one that you see THROUGH people right?
(nods "yes")
So you CAN burn a hole through them, ugh, see even when I think I'm WRONG I'm still right, damn I'm sickning honey!
Stony
This is ridiculous, baby, I don't understand it! I don't get it, I do everything right ALL the time and...
Z looks like he doesn't know what Stony's talking about.
Stony
It's not FAIR that Darnell and Julian get to have these...
(makes face; gestures wildly)
Picture perfect, happy relationships with these guys and there's NOTHING but lies and secrets between them! I don't get it!
Julian and Darnell both look at Stony, both a little drunk, and slightly offended.
Darnell
Ummm, I know you're not talking bout somebody having secrets, mary, let's not go there boo.
Darnell shakes his head like "who he think he is"? Stony clearly wants to punch Darnell in the face but he knows that he's just being a bitch cause he's mad at himself but why is Darnell talking to him like that?
Julian
(sitting up)
And Stony, I--love you to death but what secrets are there between me and Terrance?
Terrance comes over and sits down, smiling and than his face gets somewhat serious.
Terrance
(looking at Julian; smiling)
What secrets we got baby? You been secretly stealing the money from the bank and holding out on big daddy?
Stony
You're a REBOUND, like the bouncy, bouncy bears that go like this, like this, like this, REEEBOUND.
(smiles)
Now that I got THAT off my chest, who's go is it?
Do you think Stony is right and Terrence IS just a rebound?
Will Darnell spill the secret about Stony and Kaiseem's kiss?
Will Z realize that X-ray vision doesn't allow you to burn through people?
Send comments to twitter.com/boyfriendznews
*Winner* A Special Terrence & Julian Moment Ep.6, Final Scene
Scene 7
Julian's House-Outside-Porch"I guess the stars were aligned, when we, met upppp... Cause baby, I-I-I. I see the stars in your eyes anytime we touchhhh...Sometimes I just wanna go run away and hideeee. But everytime I dooo, you always find a way to come and change my minddd, you're MY heroooo, I feel like a winner when you're beside me, there aint a thing that I can't be, I feel like a winnerrrr..."
"Winner" by Karina Paisan plays in the background. Julian gets out of a cab and he sees Terrance sitting down on his front steps, not looking happy to see him. Julian sighs, walking up to him and sitting down next to him on the steps, knowing that he messed up.
Terrance
(looking down)
You...didn't go to the hospital or the dance studio, did you?
Julian
(pause)
No.(sighs)
I went to see a friend.
Terrance
Righttt. Vernon. The--"just a friend" guy. Julian...I'm not about games and if you and this guy...
Julian
(touching his arm)
And neither am I, Terrance. I'm--not one of those guys who plays with people's emotions or tries to--juggle two people at once, I can't even juggle!
Terrance is mad at Julian but smiles a little, Julian's cute. Though, Julian knows it's time to come clean to Terrance.
Julian
Vernon is--a very good friend and very--STRAIGHT--friend of mine. That's all he ever was and...that's all he'll ever be.
Terrance looks into Julian's eyes, he sees a genuine person in him and wants to be the man in his life for a long time. He takes out the box from earlier and takes out the charm bracelet.
Terrance
(getting onto one knee)
May I do the honors, kind sir?
Julian smiles at Terrance's silliness and he puts the bracelet on Julian's wrist.JulianIt fits perfectly.Julian looks into Terrance's eyes and realizes that he has a good man in his life finally, he has Vernon back in his life, and he has his friends. Leaning in, he kisses Terrance softly, The kiss breaks.
Terrance
(pause)
And you know what?
Julian
What?
TerranceI think we do too.
This time, Terrance leans in first and kisses Julian."I feel like a winner, you're there to guide me like the wind beneath my wingsss, I feel like a winnerrr--everytime I plan on giving it up, you grab my hand and look inside of me..."The two continue to kiss as "Winner" plays into the closing credits.
End of Episode.Poll
Are Terrence and Julian meant to be together?
Or are Julian and Vernon the real couple to root for?
Send comments to twitter.com/boyfriendznews
*Vernon Gives Julian Something Special* Ep. 6, Scene 6
Scene 6
Vernon's Apartment-Interior-Bedroom
"I'm boyfriend number twooooo. Cause the first one he don't reallyyyyy, seem like heeee, know what to dooooo. I'm a boyfriend number twooo...
"Boyfriend Number 2" by Pleasure P is playing. Julian knocks on the door of Vernon's bedroom and Vernon opens it, wearing sweatpants and a beater.
Vernon
Hey! Glad you could make it, have a seat.
Julian walks in and sits down on the bed, unsure of what to expect.
Julian
(tentatively)
How are you? Are you still...upset?
Vernon
(shakes head)
Nah, I did a lot of thinking today and I don't really know what the breaking--in thing was about cause--anything you wanna know about me, you could always ask, you know that right? I mean, you've never had a problem before.
Julian nods with a "can I ask if you're into men?" face. Vernon sits down on the bed next to him, he's been thinking of how to put these words together all day.
Vernon
I lost my job today.
Julian
(apologetic)
I know, I know and I'm REALLY sorry, I know how much you loved working there. Did Greg give you a reason?
Vernon
Bush! Economies so messed up that they had to do layoffs.and unfortunately, I got laid.
Julian laughs.
Vernon
It's funny though cause, um...
(scratches head)
I was sitting here, right. Thinking about how I'ma find another job, about--how I'm gonna go bust my ex boss' windows...and I was thinking about what I guess you HEARD that night in here with Angela...it was just a drunken one night stand. I haven't really talked to her since then.
Julian
(semi-happy)
Really? And...
(touches Vernon's arm)
DON'T break your boss' windows, I don't want to have to be bailing you out of jail at 3am. That's my certified "dreaming of Chris Brown" time.
They both laugh slightly and their eyes meet for a moment. Julian pulls his hand back from Vernon's arm as though there's some kind of a spark.
Julian
So you were saying, AFTER going Jazmine Sullivan on your boss...
Vernon
I realized that I've been so upset at you these past few weeks cause...we lost our friendship--Julian. Somewhere along the way, we kinda just...fell apart, you know? I mean, I miss you...(hears how that sounds)
Coming here to chill--I mean. I miss having my Jewelz around. Your...
Vernon gets up from the bed, continuing to talk to Julian about Julian.
Vernon
Funny jokes, the way you dance like you having some kind of fit when you driving, AND I even miss your--contagious Britney obsession.
(turns around; looking at Julian)
Sooo, like you said earlier...
Vernon goes over to his dresser and takes out a square that's wrapped in gift wrapping paper and sits back down on the bed.
Vernon
Friends again?
(hands him the gift)
Open it.
Julian looks down at the present, feeling like "a little high school" girl whose "getting a gift from her biggest crush". Julian opens the present. When he sees it, he smiles big ad excited.
Julian
Oh my God, Vernon! This is the deluxe edition of Britney's video anthology for "Circus"! These have been sold out for weeks!
Vernon's happy that Julian likes the gift.VernonI was gonna give it to you the night at the bowling alley but...That was the night everything had went bad between them. And neither one of them really want to think about it. Julian shakes his head, looking at Vernon and is amazed by his thoughtfulness.
Julian
(smiling)
You're the best, you know that?
Julian instinctively hugs him which surprises Vernon. At first, Vernon looks scared to hug Julian back but he slowly puts his arms around the other man's back and hugs him...it doesn't feel bad at all. He actually likes the way it feels.
Do you think Vernon is starting to realize his feelings for Julian?
Will this gift from Vernon top Terrence's gift to Julian?
Send comments to twitter.com/boyfriendznews
Vernon's Apartment-Interior-Bedroom
"I'm boyfriend number twooooo. Cause the first one he don't reallyyyyy, seem like heeee, know what to dooooo. I'm a boyfriend number twooo...
"Boyfriend Number 2" by Pleasure P is playing. Julian knocks on the door of Vernon's bedroom and Vernon opens it, wearing sweatpants and a beater.
Vernon
Hey! Glad you could make it, have a seat.
Julian walks in and sits down on the bed, unsure of what to expect.
Julian
(tentatively)
How are you? Are you still...upset?
Vernon
(shakes head)
Nah, I did a lot of thinking today and I don't really know what the breaking--in thing was about cause--anything you wanna know about me, you could always ask, you know that right? I mean, you've never had a problem before.
Julian nods with a "can I ask if you're into men?" face. Vernon sits down on the bed next to him, he's been thinking of how to put these words together all day.
Vernon
I lost my job today.
Julian
(apologetic)
I know, I know and I'm REALLY sorry, I know how much you loved working there. Did Greg give you a reason?
Vernon
Bush! Economies so messed up that they had to do layoffs.and unfortunately, I got laid.
Julian laughs.
Vernon
It's funny though cause, um...
(scratches head)
I was sitting here, right. Thinking about how I'ma find another job, about--how I'm gonna go bust my ex boss' windows...and I was thinking about what I guess you HEARD that night in here with Angela...it was just a drunken one night stand. I haven't really talked to her since then.
Julian
(semi-happy)
Really? And...
(touches Vernon's arm)
DON'T break your boss' windows, I don't want to have to be bailing you out of jail at 3am. That's my certified "dreaming of Chris Brown" time.
They both laugh slightly and their eyes meet for a moment. Julian pulls his hand back from Vernon's arm as though there's some kind of a spark.
Julian
So you were saying, AFTER going Jazmine Sullivan on your boss...
Vernon
I realized that I've been so upset at you these past few weeks cause...we lost our friendship--Julian. Somewhere along the way, we kinda just...fell apart, you know? I mean, I miss you...(hears how that sounds)
Coming here to chill--I mean. I miss having my Jewelz around. Your...
Vernon gets up from the bed, continuing to talk to Julian about Julian.
Vernon
Funny jokes, the way you dance like you having some kind of fit when you driving, AND I even miss your--contagious Britney obsession.
(turns around; looking at Julian)
Sooo, like you said earlier...
Vernon goes over to his dresser and takes out a square that's wrapped in gift wrapping paper and sits back down on the bed.
Vernon
Friends again?
(hands him the gift)
Open it.
Julian looks down at the present, feeling like "a little high school" girl whose "getting a gift from her biggest crush". Julian opens the present. When he sees it, he smiles big ad excited.
Julian
Oh my God, Vernon! This is the deluxe edition of Britney's video anthology for "Circus"! These have been sold out for weeks!
Vernon's happy that Julian likes the gift.VernonI was gonna give it to you the night at the bowling alley but...That was the night everything had went bad between them. And neither one of them really want to think about it. Julian shakes his head, looking at Vernon and is amazed by his thoughtfulness.
Julian
(smiling)
You're the best, you know that?
Julian instinctively hugs him which surprises Vernon. At first, Vernon looks scared to hug Julian back but he slowly puts his arms around the other man's back and hugs him...it doesn't feel bad at all. He actually likes the way it feels.
Do you think Vernon is starting to realize his feelings for Julian?
Will this gift from Vernon top Terrence's gift to Julian?
Send comments to twitter.com/boyfriendznews
Friday, September 4, 2009
Ep. 6, *DICKMATIZED*
Scene 4
Lisa's-Interior-Table
Later that night, the Boyfriends as well as Terreance are at their table, talking and drinking as usual.
Z
So Vernon LOST his job? Why? It looked like he REALLY liked that devil worshipping haven disguised as an outlet for the skateboarding children...and I got a lot of cute stuff from there, I was HOPING to pull another scandal and get more.
Stony
Yeah, ALL girl stuff, nothing I could wear!
(changes mind)
Accept that pink thermal hoody, I'm keeping that.
Julian
I...really don't know. I just know that he loved working at that store. I don't know what he's gonna do.
Terrance
Vernon? That's your friend, right? The dude sitting in the car that night I brought you back to Z's place?
Julian isn't sure what to call Vernon now actually so he decides to...
Julian
(changing subject)
So back to Malik! You guys--did it--ALL over your--office, Darnell?
Darnell
On every piece of high end furniture that I own and I think I'm in love! No! I'm not in love...
Z
You not in love, boo, you just hypnotized by the "business", nothing wrong with that, girl. Lord knows sex is a big part of a...
Darnell
(scared)
Don't you DARE say relationship, I do NOT do relationships.Me and Malik are NOT in a relationship.
Stony
But you like him.DarnellI like the SEX! The SEX! The SEX is what I'm in love with. We're competition in the world of real estate! We could NEVER be involved with each other...
Terrance
So you would date him, it's just that...
Darnell starts itching.
Darnell
STOP using these words, they're making me have some kind of a...
(scratches again)
Allergic reaction.
(points to Terrance)
YOU haven't even been initiated into the Boyfriendz yet so keep ya comments to yaself and WHY have you been teasing MY bestfriend with this damn Juicy Couture bracelet? He's been talking about it ALL day, either buy the damn bracelet or let me do it, but PLEASE...
Terrance goes into his inside jacket pocket and takes out a small black box, opening it and showing Julian the Juicy Couture bracelet he was talking about earlier. Julian looks shocked that Darnell just put him on the spot like that and even more shocked that Terrance actually brought him the bracelet.
Julian
(wide-eyed)
Terrance! Why did you...you didn't have to do this. Why DID you do this?
Terrance
Causeeeee I want you to gimme SOME and THIS is the...(points to bracelet)"Get booty" bracelet! Least that's what the sales associate said.
They all look shocked.
Terrance
(looking at the "Boyfriendz")
Hey! Don't be giving me that hungry, lion look like the four of ya'll bout to eat me--I'm JUST playing, I'm JUST playing.
(looks at Julian)
Remember we were at my house and YOU were looking at that Vibe magazine and you saw that...
Julian
(finishing sentence)
Picture of Kimora wearing THIS bracelet.
(touched)
You actually remembered. Thank you, Terrance.They kiss lightly on the lips, they look happy with one another. Z, Darnell, and Stony look like they're enjoying their friend being happy with a man for once.
Terrance
I'm gonna--hit the men's room real quick, drain the captain and I'll be right back.
Julian
(smiles; smitten)
Ok.
Terrance gets up and goes to the bathroom. Julian's phone beeps twice and he checks it, his eyes going wide.
Z
Looks like somebody is a smitten kitten.
Ston
Smitten aint the word, Terrance is...
Darnell
(to Julian)
A rebound that Julian hopefully realizes is a lot more stable than that straight boy.
Julian
Terrance is NOT a rebound, I like him a lot.
(looks at the bracelet)
A guy's NEVER given me jewelry before.
(his phone beeps; checks it; shocked)
Oh my...I don't believe this. Vernon just texted me that he wants to see me. Tonight.
(looking around)
Stony
Than go see him, mary! You might finally be getting your man this time...
Darnell
I thought we were OVER the cute and now BROKE ex-store clerk.
(to Juian)
No backsliding, Julian. Don't make me have to get you one of those Excorsism of Emilies Roses.
Julian
(to Z)
I'm surprised because I told him what we did and he was royally pissed off! Well what I did, I left...
(points to Z)
YOUR name out of it even though it WAS your genius idea to break into his apartment. I wonder what he wants to talk to me about? I-I need to go.Julian gets up from the table.
Z
Wait a minute, what about Terrance? THAT boy just gave you a gift that shouldddd...
(gives Stony a look)
Have been given to ME a long time ago. You better not mess this up on no shoulda, coulda, woulda, cause if you do I'ma get you.StonyI think the better question is--does your new boo know that Vernon could have been your ALMOST boo had he been into the boys, mary?
Julian shakes his head, feeling like too many things are being thrown at him at once, all he wants to do is go see Vernon.
Julian
Guys, please! I know that I said I was over Vernon and I am and I REALLY, REALLY like Terrance but...I miss my FRIEND, Vernon.
Darnell and Z share a look, their "secret" about Vernon still hanging over their heads.
Z
(giving in)
We'll...tell him you had an emergency.
Darnell
And I'll...give you a ride to Vernon's cause I know your middle class butt would be Rosa Parks-ing it, let's go.
Darnell gets up from the table, he and Julian start to leave Lisa's but than Julian remembers something.
Julian
(turning to face Z and Stony)
And please make the "emergency" believable, nothing crazy that Terrance KNOWS can't be true.
Stony
Can you give us a little more credit? We GOT this, son!
Z looks at him funny.
Stony
Didn't pull it off, did I?
Z shakes his head no while Julian and Darnell leave. Terrance comes out the bathroom, seeing Julian gone and his gift still on the table. He's confused....
Terrance
Where'd my boo go?
Terrance looks sad, he sits down picking up the box.TerranceYou guys are his friends so you'd be honest with me, right? Was THIS...
(picks up the box)
Too much, too fast?
Z
(pause)
Julian left because he had a emergency at the dance studio...
Stony
Hospital!
Terrance looks confused even more. Z and Stony look at each other trying to get their story straight.
Z
He went to the HOSPITAL with Darnell to get...
Stony
Some emergency HELP BEFORE--he went to the dance studio cause Darnell...
Z(out of nowhere)
Done choked on a chicken!
Stony and Terrance both give him strange looks.
Z
(out of nowhere)
Choked a chicken!
Stony and Terrance, give him looks with their mind thinking of another oral activity.
Z
(looks at Stony)
What?! At least it's believable, it's Darnell!
Will Terrence take back the gift he got for Julian?
What did Vernon want with Julian?
And is Darnell really dickmatized?
Send comments to twitter.com/boyfriendznews
Lisa's-Interior-Table
Later that night, the Boyfriends as well as Terreance are at their table, talking and drinking as usual.
Z
So Vernon LOST his job? Why? It looked like he REALLY liked that devil worshipping haven disguised as an outlet for the skateboarding children...and I got a lot of cute stuff from there, I was HOPING to pull another scandal and get more.
Stony
Yeah, ALL girl stuff, nothing I could wear!
(changes mind)
Accept that pink thermal hoody, I'm keeping that.
Julian
I...really don't know. I just know that he loved working at that store. I don't know what he's gonna do.
Terrance
Vernon? That's your friend, right? The dude sitting in the car that night I brought you back to Z's place?
Julian isn't sure what to call Vernon now actually so he decides to...
Julian
(changing subject)
So back to Malik! You guys--did it--ALL over your--office, Darnell?
Darnell
On every piece of high end furniture that I own and I think I'm in love! No! I'm not in love...
Z
You not in love, boo, you just hypnotized by the "business", nothing wrong with that, girl. Lord knows sex is a big part of a...
Darnell
(scared)
Don't you DARE say relationship, I do NOT do relationships.Me and Malik are NOT in a relationship.
Stony
But you like him.DarnellI like the SEX! The SEX! The SEX is what I'm in love with. We're competition in the world of real estate! We could NEVER be involved with each other...
Terrance
So you would date him, it's just that...
Darnell starts itching.
Darnell
STOP using these words, they're making me have some kind of a...
(scratches again)
Allergic reaction.
(points to Terrance)
YOU haven't even been initiated into the Boyfriendz yet so keep ya comments to yaself and WHY have you been teasing MY bestfriend with this damn Juicy Couture bracelet? He's been talking about it ALL day, either buy the damn bracelet or let me do it, but PLEASE...
Terrance goes into his inside jacket pocket and takes out a small black box, opening it and showing Julian the Juicy Couture bracelet he was talking about earlier. Julian looks shocked that Darnell just put him on the spot like that and even more shocked that Terrance actually brought him the bracelet.
Julian
(wide-eyed)
Terrance! Why did you...you didn't have to do this. Why DID you do this?
Terrance
Causeeeee I want you to gimme SOME and THIS is the...(points to bracelet)"Get booty" bracelet! Least that's what the sales associate said.
They all look shocked.
Terrance
(looking at the "Boyfriendz")
Hey! Don't be giving me that hungry, lion look like the four of ya'll bout to eat me--I'm JUST playing, I'm JUST playing.
(looks at Julian)
Remember we were at my house and YOU were looking at that Vibe magazine and you saw that...
Julian
(finishing sentence)
Picture of Kimora wearing THIS bracelet.
(touched)
You actually remembered. Thank you, Terrance.They kiss lightly on the lips, they look happy with one another. Z, Darnell, and Stony look like they're enjoying their friend being happy with a man for once.
Terrance
I'm gonna--hit the men's room real quick, drain the captain and I'll be right back.
Julian
(smiles; smitten)
Ok.
Terrance gets up and goes to the bathroom. Julian's phone beeps twice and he checks it, his eyes going wide.
Z
Looks like somebody is a smitten kitten.
Ston
Smitten aint the word, Terrance is...
Darnell
(to Julian)
A rebound that Julian hopefully realizes is a lot more stable than that straight boy.
Julian
Terrance is NOT a rebound, I like him a lot.
(looks at the bracelet)
A guy's NEVER given me jewelry before.
(his phone beeps; checks it; shocked)
Oh my...I don't believe this. Vernon just texted me that he wants to see me. Tonight.
(looking around)
Stony
Than go see him, mary! You might finally be getting your man this time...
Darnell
I thought we were OVER the cute and now BROKE ex-store clerk.
(to Juian)
No backsliding, Julian. Don't make me have to get you one of those Excorsism of Emilies Roses.
Julian
(to Z)
I'm surprised because I told him what we did and he was royally pissed off! Well what I did, I left...
(points to Z)
YOUR name out of it even though it WAS your genius idea to break into his apartment. I wonder what he wants to talk to me about? I-I need to go.Julian gets up from the table.
Z
Wait a minute, what about Terrance? THAT boy just gave you a gift that shouldddd...
(gives Stony a look)
Have been given to ME a long time ago. You better not mess this up on no shoulda, coulda, woulda, cause if you do I'ma get you.StonyI think the better question is--does your new boo know that Vernon could have been your ALMOST boo had he been into the boys, mary?
Julian shakes his head, feeling like too many things are being thrown at him at once, all he wants to do is go see Vernon.
Julian
Guys, please! I know that I said I was over Vernon and I am and I REALLY, REALLY like Terrance but...I miss my FRIEND, Vernon.
Darnell and Z share a look, their "secret" about Vernon still hanging over their heads.
Z
(giving in)
We'll...tell him you had an emergency.
Darnell
And I'll...give you a ride to Vernon's cause I know your middle class butt would be Rosa Parks-ing it, let's go.
Darnell gets up from the table, he and Julian start to leave Lisa's but than Julian remembers something.
Julian
(turning to face Z and Stony)
And please make the "emergency" believable, nothing crazy that Terrance KNOWS can't be true.
Stony
Can you give us a little more credit? We GOT this, son!
Z looks at him funny.
Stony
Didn't pull it off, did I?
Z shakes his head no while Julian and Darnell leave. Terrance comes out the bathroom, seeing Julian gone and his gift still on the table. He's confused....
Terrance
Where'd my boo go?
Terrance looks sad, he sits down picking up the box.TerranceYou guys are his friends so you'd be honest with me, right? Was THIS...
(picks up the box)
Too much, too fast?
Z
(pause)
Julian left because he had a emergency at the dance studio...
Stony
Hospital!
Terrance looks confused even more. Z and Stony look at each other trying to get their story straight.
Z
He went to the HOSPITAL with Darnell to get...
Stony
Some emergency HELP BEFORE--he went to the dance studio cause Darnell...
Z(out of nowhere)
Done choked on a chicken!
Stony and Terrance both give him strange looks.
Z
(out of nowhere)
Choked a chicken!
Stony and Terrance, give him looks with their mind thinking of another oral activity.
Z
(looks at Stony)
What?! At least it's believable, it's Darnell!
Will Terrence take back the gift he got for Julian?
What did Vernon want with Julian?
And is Darnell really dickmatized?
Send comments to twitter.com/boyfriendznews
Julian's Journal Entry Ep. 5 *Terrence Or Vernon*?
Hey guys! So I know I haven't written to you in a long time but you are my thoughts so you kind of already know what's going on!
So after the whole debacle with being stuck under Vernon's bed while he had sex with a hot woman right on top of me and Z's heads...I kinda, went a little...depressed. I HATED men! I mean, Vernon is--a gay boy's dream! Tall, light eyes that are naturally his, can dance his ass off...but I had to let go of the fantasy.
So remember when Darnell came to "pick me up from the broken pieces of love despair"? Well, we went speend dating at Secrets and I met Terrence. A normal gay guy with a great smile who smells like a meadow of fresh scents...am I rambling? Yes, I'm rambling because I LIKE him alot! He's so into me and funny and thoughtful, he brought me a Juicy Couture bracelet, how many girls can say that? *wink*
I'm writing this before I go to meet Terrence and the guys for lunch, Darnell's panicking because Malik Kyle put it on him so bad that now, he thinks he just may be "dickmatized" by him. Vernon hasn't talked to me since I told him about the breaking and entering. Don't know how to feel about that. Until next time, muahz.
Send comments to twitter.com/Boyfriendznews
So after the whole debacle with being stuck under Vernon's bed while he had sex with a hot woman right on top of me and Z's heads...I kinda, went a little...depressed. I HATED men! I mean, Vernon is--a gay boy's dream! Tall, light eyes that are naturally his, can dance his ass off...but I had to let go of the fantasy.
So remember when Darnell came to "pick me up from the broken pieces of love despair"? Well, we went speend dating at Secrets and I met Terrence. A normal gay guy with a great smile who smells like a meadow of fresh scents...am I rambling? Yes, I'm rambling because I LIKE him alot! He's so into me and funny and thoughtful, he brought me a Juicy Couture bracelet, how many girls can say that? *wink*
I'm writing this before I go to meet Terrence and the guys for lunch, Darnell's panicking because Malik Kyle put it on him so bad that now, he thinks he just may be "dickmatized" by him. Vernon hasn't talked to me since I told him about the breaking and entering. Don't know how to feel about that. Until next time, muahz.
Send comments to twitter.com/Boyfriendznews
Ep. 6, *Stony And Kaiseem's Lunch Date*, Scene 3
Scene 3
Stony and Kaiseem are at a restaurant in the afternoon and Stony is sitting there with his arms crossed, wanting to get things over with. "Good Good" by Ashanti plays in the background. Kaiseem has just finished ordering with the waitress.
Kaiseem
Thank you for coming out with me to lunch, Stony. I would have opted for dinner...
Stony
Apparently you turn into a blackmailing, werewolf at night so dinner was out of the question, you lucky you got this. You know what I just realized, you're that chick in Beyonce's new movie, "Obsessed" AND I haven't giving you none in years!
(pats himself on the back)
I got that "Good Good".
Kaiseem
(getting to the point)
Do you love him?
Stony
Love who?
KaiseemYour...boyfriend, Z. I want to know that after you left me that he wasn't just--a rebound off the pain that I caused you.
Stony
You trying to be all deep and that's not what this conversation is for. You gonna let my baby LIVE in our apartment because if you don't...
Kaiseem
Stony, we were together for a year and a half! You were never like this, all this...gayness? What happened to you? I know when you're hurt, people go to some crazy extremes but Z? Come on...
Stony
Listen, I TOLD you about talking about my man like that...
Kaiseem
Stony...
(takes his hand)
When we were together, you had dreams. Before you moved here, after we broke up, you wanted to do things. Are you telling me that meeting Z didn't change ANY of that for you?
Stony thinks about that, he's a little thrown off that Kaiseem is asking these kinds of questions.
Stony
Meeting Z was...different than what I thought my next relationship would be like but...
Kaiseem
But...what?StonyI'm used to it. It's something that I've grown to love and as crazy as my baby is, he's NEVER shown me the kind of disrespect you have.
Kaiseem
(smiles)
I told you that's what you were still mad about...Kaiseem runs his fingers along Stony's hand and he pulls it back quickly.
Stony
Don't be trying to fondle me! This is exactly what I'm talking about, Kaiseem. I have a BOYFRIEND, ok?! A boyfriend that I love and who loves me, why can't you gay pricks respect a crazy, dysfunctional relationship between two people who love each other? That's why the kitty cat going round getting everybody with the gotcha, gotcha cause you boys are trifling!
Kaiseem seems to get the point that Stony doesn't want him and relents, he did screw up when he cheated on Stony two years ago and now he's happy...even if it's not the way or with WHO Kaiseem thought it would be with after him.
Kaiseem
I guess--there's not much else to say now is there...?
Stony shakes his head, "no". Kaiseem gets up from the table defeated and leaves. The waitress comes with the food and puts the food down.
StonyOh, THIS is gonna be sick! Mary, can you bring some steak sauce? You trying to get me with the gotcha and make me choke to death on this dry ass meat!
Do you think what Stony said is true about dysfunctional relationships? Don't break up a happy dysfunction?
Does Kaiseem have a point about Stony's dreams being deferred because of his relationship with Z?
Send comments to twitter.com/boyfriendznews
Stony and Kaiseem are at a restaurant in the afternoon and Stony is sitting there with his arms crossed, wanting to get things over with. "Good Good" by Ashanti plays in the background. Kaiseem has just finished ordering with the waitress.
Kaiseem
Thank you for coming out with me to lunch, Stony. I would have opted for dinner...
Stony
Apparently you turn into a blackmailing, werewolf at night so dinner was out of the question, you lucky you got this. You know what I just realized, you're that chick in Beyonce's new movie, "Obsessed" AND I haven't giving you none in years!
(pats himself on the back)
I got that "Good Good".
Kaiseem
(getting to the point)
Do you love him?
Stony
Love who?
KaiseemYour...boyfriend, Z. I want to know that after you left me that he wasn't just--a rebound off the pain that I caused you.
Stony
You trying to be all deep and that's not what this conversation is for. You gonna let my baby LIVE in our apartment because if you don't...
Kaiseem
Stony, we were together for a year and a half! You were never like this, all this...gayness? What happened to you? I know when you're hurt, people go to some crazy extremes but Z? Come on...
Stony
Listen, I TOLD you about talking about my man like that...
Kaiseem
Stony...
(takes his hand)
When we were together, you had dreams. Before you moved here, after we broke up, you wanted to do things. Are you telling me that meeting Z didn't change ANY of that for you?
Stony thinks about that, he's a little thrown off that Kaiseem is asking these kinds of questions.
Stony
Meeting Z was...different than what I thought my next relationship would be like but...
Kaiseem
But...what?StonyI'm used to it. It's something that I've grown to love and as crazy as my baby is, he's NEVER shown me the kind of disrespect you have.
Kaiseem
(smiles)
I told you that's what you were still mad about...Kaiseem runs his fingers along Stony's hand and he pulls it back quickly.
Stony
Don't be trying to fondle me! This is exactly what I'm talking about, Kaiseem. I have a BOYFRIEND, ok?! A boyfriend that I love and who loves me, why can't you gay pricks respect a crazy, dysfunctional relationship between two people who love each other? That's why the kitty cat going round getting everybody with the gotcha, gotcha cause you boys are trifling!
Kaiseem seems to get the point that Stony doesn't want him and relents, he did screw up when he cheated on Stony two years ago and now he's happy...even if it's not the way or with WHO Kaiseem thought it would be with after him.
Kaiseem
I guess--there's not much else to say now is there...?
Stony shakes his head, "no". Kaiseem gets up from the table defeated and leaves. The waitress comes with the food and puts the food down.
StonyOh, THIS is gonna be sick! Mary, can you bring some steak sauce? You trying to get me with the gotcha and make me choke to death on this dry ass meat!
Do you think what Stony said is true about dysfunctional relationships? Don't break up a happy dysfunction?
Does Kaiseem have a point about Stony's dreams being deferred because of his relationship with Z?
Send comments to twitter.com/boyfriendznews
Ep. 6, *Darnell Getz Got!*, Scene 2
Scene 2
Brooks Reality-Waiting Room
Z is sitting at the desk looking like he's nervous as hell and worried. He grabs the phone as if he's going to pick it up but than decides not to. Julian comes in, looking just as nervous and worried. Julian goes over to Z's desk.
Z
(quick)
We NEED to call the po-po, Darnell done GOT got by the gotcha that came up in here and got em.
Julian
Ok. I got a voicemail. From you. Saying that you had an emergency at work...
(looks around)
Where's the emergency, mary? I almost ended my life on about seven intesections trying to get over here.
Z
Darnell has been in a meeting for--THREE hours! With Malik Kyle, girl...he is sickning, bitch! Me and my husband bout to buy a house and that is EXACTLY where we gonna get it from, Malik Kyle...mary! I would get got with HIS gotcha by him any day.
Julian
(clueless)
Whose Malik Kyle?
Z jumps back, how could Julian not know this?
Z
He's only one of THE most successful real state brokers in New Jersey! Like...
(starts counting on fingers)
A HUNDRED times better than that hot tailed, SLUM estate broker in there!
(points to Darnell's office door)
Julian
(caught up)
And they've been in there for three hours? So have you heard screaming? Somebody getting yolked up, manhandled? I'm STILL trying to find this "e-mer-gen-cia", as you call it.
Z
Mary, the SHADE is that they went IN there, I heard them yelling at each other, and than some stuff fell on the floor... and it got quiet.
Julian looks worried.
Julian
Do you think we should really call the police? You know Darnell's temper's a little...out there.
Z
Malik's been trying to take Darnell's clients for weeks! That's why I'm a little scared! Though, I've been going to Malik's building every morning and setting them miniature forest fires, ya know, just to help Darnell out a little bit.
(scratches behind his ear; looking down)
I might have to...stay at your place for a little while, HIDE OUT--from--the C.I.A, cause you KNOW they after me, girl!
Julian
(trying to keep up)
Soooo, what was this big, scary, life threatening THING? I REALLY thought something bad happened to you.
Z
It did! Do you see what time it is? Darnell told me that if he wasn't out in thirty minutes to call the police because that meant that he probably got Malik with the gotcha.
(points to Julian, telling him off)
Instead of having your head up Terrance's ass, you SHOULD be reading these...
(shows him magazines)
Real estate magazines and pamphlets.
Julian
YOU read those? You HATE reading.
Z
(very business like)
You GOTTA keep on the up and up in the corporate world! Otherwise, you gonna get yaself got with the gotcha gotcha that shouldn't have gotten you in the first place like it got Darnell.(gestures toward's Darnell's office door with his head)
Darnell's door opens and Malik comes out, fixing his tie. We don't see Darnell yet. Malik turns and talks to Darnell, whose still in the office. Malik is brown skin with a short haircut with waves and is very tall. Think "Sammie" from "Kiss Me Through The Phone".
Malik
So we'll talk tomorrow...over dinner. He smoothes his hair back like "I'm the man" and leaves the scene. Z and Julian look like "what just happened?"
Julian
Darnell?
Darnell comes to the door, stumbling, his clothes are on inside out and he's holding onto the doorway for support, it looks like he just went through his own person earthquake.
Z
Girllll, he jacked you UP!
DarnellMake a note! Hold my calls...cancel my appointments and close down shop for the day. Cause I'm out for the count.Darnell falls backwards onto the floor, fainting. Julian and Z look at each other.
Z
I think NOW we should call the po-po, the emergencia AND the C.I.A cause that fool just killed Darnell!
Will Malik Kyle be the man to tie Darnell down finally?
Will Z and Stony get a house that got the gotcha from Malik?
Send comments to twitter.com/Boyfriendznews
Brooks Reality-Waiting Room
Z is sitting at the desk looking like he's nervous as hell and worried. He grabs the phone as if he's going to pick it up but than decides not to. Julian comes in, looking just as nervous and worried. Julian goes over to Z's desk.
Z
(quick)
We NEED to call the po-po, Darnell done GOT got by the gotcha that came up in here and got em.
Julian
Ok. I got a voicemail. From you. Saying that you had an emergency at work...
(looks around)
Where's the emergency, mary? I almost ended my life on about seven intesections trying to get over here.
Z
Darnell has been in a meeting for--THREE hours! With Malik Kyle, girl...he is sickning, bitch! Me and my husband bout to buy a house and that is EXACTLY where we gonna get it from, Malik Kyle...mary! I would get got with HIS gotcha by him any day.
Julian
(clueless)
Whose Malik Kyle?
Z jumps back, how could Julian not know this?
Z
He's only one of THE most successful real state brokers in New Jersey! Like...
(starts counting on fingers)
A HUNDRED times better than that hot tailed, SLUM estate broker in there!
(points to Darnell's office door)
Julian
(caught up)
And they've been in there for three hours? So have you heard screaming? Somebody getting yolked up, manhandled? I'm STILL trying to find this "e-mer-gen-cia", as you call it.
Z
Mary, the SHADE is that they went IN there, I heard them yelling at each other, and than some stuff fell on the floor... and it got quiet.
Julian looks worried.
Julian
Do you think we should really call the police? You know Darnell's temper's a little...out there.
Z
Malik's been trying to take Darnell's clients for weeks! That's why I'm a little scared! Though, I've been going to Malik's building every morning and setting them miniature forest fires, ya know, just to help Darnell out a little bit.
(scratches behind his ear; looking down)
I might have to...stay at your place for a little while, HIDE OUT--from--the C.I.A, cause you KNOW they after me, girl!
Julian
(trying to keep up)
Soooo, what was this big, scary, life threatening THING? I REALLY thought something bad happened to you.
Z
It did! Do you see what time it is? Darnell told me that if he wasn't out in thirty minutes to call the police because that meant that he probably got Malik with the gotcha.
(points to Julian, telling him off)
Instead of having your head up Terrance's ass, you SHOULD be reading these...
(shows him magazines)
Real estate magazines and pamphlets.
Julian
YOU read those? You HATE reading.
Z
(very business like)
You GOTTA keep on the up and up in the corporate world! Otherwise, you gonna get yaself got with the gotcha gotcha that shouldn't have gotten you in the first place like it got Darnell.(gestures toward's Darnell's office door with his head)
Darnell's door opens and Malik comes out, fixing his tie. We don't see Darnell yet. Malik turns and talks to Darnell, whose still in the office. Malik is brown skin with a short haircut with waves and is very tall. Think "Sammie" from "Kiss Me Through The Phone".
Malik
So we'll talk tomorrow...over dinner. He smoothes his hair back like "I'm the man" and leaves the scene. Z and Julian look like "what just happened?"
Julian
Darnell?
Darnell comes to the door, stumbling, his clothes are on inside out and he's holding onto the doorway for support, it looks like he just went through his own person earthquake.
Z
Girllll, he jacked you UP!
DarnellMake a note! Hold my calls...cancel my appointments and close down shop for the day. Cause I'm out for the count.Darnell falls backwards onto the floor, fainting. Julian and Z look at each other.
Z
I think NOW we should call the po-po, the emergencia AND the C.I.A cause that fool just killed Darnell!
Will Malik Kyle be the man to tie Darnell down finally?
Will Z and Stony get a house that got the gotcha from Malik?
Send comments to twitter.com/Boyfriendznews
Monday, August 17, 2009
Ep. 4, "Z and Julian's Master Plan
Scene 3 from Episode 4, "Sherlock Homo"
Lisa's-Interior-Table
Julian is sitting down at the table, sipping on a drink when Z runs in and sits down. He's visibly out of breath.
Julian
Are you...ok?
Z
(breathless)
Darnell...doesn't know...I'm go--go...oh girl, I think I'm about to see them pearly gates.
(drinks some Julian's water; throws ice on his face)
Julian
You snuck out of work?
Z
Darnell was in a meeting with a client so aint NO point in me staying there BORED as HELL I can only have but SO much fun ordering wigs on Darnell's company credit card! After awhile it gets kinda...
Julian
Illegal? Fradualent?
Z
Addicting, mary! I ordered me enough wigs to last a YEAR. I ALMOST started to buy some costumes too but I figured I'd--be nice and...
Julian
Reduce your federal prison sentence by choosing to not STEAL more of Darnell's money to fund your drag career.
Z
Girl, that it is LEGAL. That's what PRETTY cash is forrrrr. To BUY pretty things!
Julian
(laughs)
It's PETTY cash.
Z
And this is a PETTY conversation that's WASTING both out time. So what was SOOOO important that you felt the need to interrupt my WORK, shopping experience?
Julian
THIS.
Julian hands Z Vernon's phone that he found earlier, there's a picture of him and Julian making funny faces as his screen saver.
Z
Awww. Don't you guys look like the cutest, confusing, gay straight couple ever.
(hands the phone back to see)
You going through it, girl? Putting pictures of you and your "unrequited love" on your phone. Is that why you called me?
Julian
No. Well, yeah, I AM going through it but that's not why I called you. This ISN'T my phone...it's Vernon's.
Z
(angry)
You stole that boy's phone?! Oh lord. Ok, ok, ok, don't panic.
(calms himself)
My bestfriend's gone "Crazy In Love" like Beyonce over Jay-Z! YOU'VE become a stalker!
(softly; concerned)
Julian, we will get you the help you need...
Julian
You need to stop watching "Snapped" causeee--you a little snapped yaself. Vernon came to the dance studio today during one my classes and he dropped his phone when he left. Of course, that was after he ripped me a new one for igging him the past week.
Z
Does he understand the concept you snooze, you lose? If he doesn't wanna accept that he likes men and wants to keep leading you on, than you need to go out there and do you, boo. And that's exactly what you did, aint nothing wrong with that.
Julian
But I didn't, Z. I didn't stop talking to Vernon because I wanted to talk to other guys. I did it because I didn't wanna deal with my feelings for HIM but...after today, after the way he talked to me...I don't know. Maybe I should just put it out there finally and hope for the best no matter WHAT the outcome is.
Z
Or look like a FOOL! Julian, you've tried...
Julian
NO, I haven't. I always THINK about--saying--SOMETHING, ANTYHING to him about how I feel but...
Z
(understanding)You don't wanna be rejected.
Julian
(pause)
Yeah. Pretty much.
Z
Well, you called the right bitch cause WE? About to find out what the hell's going on with Vernon, voluntarily or involuntarily.
(Z pulls out some gloves from his bag)
Julian
(shocked)
Wh--what are the gloves for? Why do you have rubber gloves in your bag?
Z
Oh, so you choose NOW to ask questions? You shoulda been asking Vernon questions! Now just stop being nosy and let mama work. Gimme that phone.
Julian hands him the phone.
Julian
Um Z...where are we going?
Z
To Vernon's house.
Julian
Vernon's at work.
Z
Well duh, I would hope the hell so. Him being home means I can't use my kit.
Julian
What ki...?
(decides not to ask)
Nevermind, let's go.
(gets up from the table)
Wait, don't you have to go back to work?
Z
(not caring)
Mary, I've been off the clock since my lunch break, let's pump boo.
Julian and Z leave Lisa's.
Lisa's-Interior-Table
Julian is sitting down at the table, sipping on a drink when Z runs in and sits down. He's visibly out of breath.
Julian
Are you...ok?
Z
(breathless)
Darnell...doesn't know...I'm go--go...oh girl, I think I'm about to see them pearly gates.
(drinks some Julian's water; throws ice on his face)
Julian
You snuck out of work?
Z
Darnell was in a meeting with a client so aint NO point in me staying there BORED as HELL I can only have but SO much fun ordering wigs on Darnell's company credit card! After awhile it gets kinda...
Julian
Illegal? Fradualent?
Z
Addicting, mary! I ordered me enough wigs to last a YEAR. I ALMOST started to buy some costumes too but I figured I'd--be nice and...
Julian
Reduce your federal prison sentence by choosing to not STEAL more of Darnell's money to fund your drag career.
Z
Girl, that it is LEGAL. That's what PRETTY cash is forrrrr. To BUY pretty things!
Julian
(laughs)
It's PETTY cash.
Z
And this is a PETTY conversation that's WASTING both out time. So what was SOOOO important that you felt the need to interrupt my WORK, shopping experience?
Julian
THIS.
Julian hands Z Vernon's phone that he found earlier, there's a picture of him and Julian making funny faces as his screen saver.
Z
Awww. Don't you guys look like the cutest, confusing, gay straight couple ever.
(hands the phone back to see)
You going through it, girl? Putting pictures of you and your "unrequited love" on your phone. Is that why you called me?
Julian
No. Well, yeah, I AM going through it but that's not why I called you. This ISN'T my phone...it's Vernon's.
Z
(angry)
You stole that boy's phone?! Oh lord. Ok, ok, ok, don't panic.
(calms himself)
My bestfriend's gone "Crazy In Love" like Beyonce over Jay-Z! YOU'VE become a stalker!
(softly; concerned)
Julian, we will get you the help you need...
Julian
You need to stop watching "Snapped" causeee--you a little snapped yaself. Vernon came to the dance studio today during one my classes and he dropped his phone when he left. Of course, that was after he ripped me a new one for igging him the past week.
Z
Does he understand the concept you snooze, you lose? If he doesn't wanna accept that he likes men and wants to keep leading you on, than you need to go out there and do you, boo. And that's exactly what you did, aint nothing wrong with that.
Julian
But I didn't, Z. I didn't stop talking to Vernon because I wanted to talk to other guys. I did it because I didn't wanna deal with my feelings for HIM but...after today, after the way he talked to me...I don't know. Maybe I should just put it out there finally and hope for the best no matter WHAT the outcome is.
Z
Or look like a FOOL! Julian, you've tried...
Julian
NO, I haven't. I always THINK about--saying--SOMETHING, ANTYHING to him about how I feel but...
Z
(understanding)You don't wanna be rejected.
Julian
(pause)
Yeah. Pretty much.
Z
Well, you called the right bitch cause WE? About to find out what the hell's going on with Vernon, voluntarily or involuntarily.
(Z pulls out some gloves from his bag)
Julian
(shocked)
Wh--what are the gloves for? Why do you have rubber gloves in your bag?
Z
Oh, so you choose NOW to ask questions? You shoulda been asking Vernon questions! Now just stop being nosy and let mama work. Gimme that phone.
Julian hands him the phone.
Julian
Um Z...where are we going?
Z
To Vernon's house.
Julian
Vernon's at work.
Z
Well duh, I would hope the hell so. Him being home means I can't use my kit.
Julian
What ki...?
(decides not to ask)
Nevermind, let's go.
(gets up from the table)
Wait, don't you have to go back to work?
Z
(not caring)
Mary, I've been off the clock since my lunch break, let's pump boo.
Julian and Z leave Lisa's.
Friday, August 14, 2009
Ep.3, Z Signs Her Soul To The Devil
Scene 1
Lisa's-Interior
Z, Darnell, and Julian are sitting at a table, eating lunch, and talking. Z is looking through the paper.
Julian
Soooo Darnell, have you found a new assistant yet?
Darnell
(scoffs)
Please, in this recession? I'll be lucky if I find someone to clean the dust off of poor Estelle's desk.
Julian
Really? I thought people would be jumping at the chance to work at Brooks Reality? It's one of the most talked about real estate companies in New Jersey.
Z
(looking through the paper)
And Darnell's the most talked about, dug out, boss in the tri-state area. I'm kinda surprised that this ad you posted in the paper hasn't bursted into flames yet...
(gets a look from Darnell)
Well, I'M JUST SAYING! When the Prince of Darkess puts an ad in the paper to BUY someone's soul, eventually the paper's gonna go UP in fiery flames! And we all know Darnell is the Prince of Darkness reincarnated.
Julian
(laughs)
Are we going out this weekend? It's Friday and I feel that we haven't gone out in a VERY long time together.
(pouts)
I miss us hanging out.
Z
Well, we miss you too. Seeing as how we don't see you that much anymore since you've been playing with your new toy.
Julian
(confused)
New toy? What are you talking about, Z?
Darnell
She's TALKING about Vernon and the fact that you spend almost everyday with him. I'M starting to feel neglected. So either start dating the store clerk or DROP him because HE'S messing up the group dynamic AND YOUR Darnell time.
Julian
(gives Darnell a look)
You're jealous.DarnellUm yeah, you're MY bestfriend, not his. What's he giving you that I'm not, huh?
Julian
(thinks)
I HAVE been spending a lot of time with him, haven't I? You know sometimes it feels like we're dating but he's not gay. I'm dating a straight man.
(makes a face)
Normally, that would be my fantasy but now it's kinda starting to become...frustrating. Both mentally and sexually.
Z
(to Darnell)
You wanna know WHY Julian would rather spend time torturing himself with daydreams about Vernon that are never going to come true than hang out with you? Because unlike you, Vernon probably shows more interest in Julian than he does himself. You're very self absorbed and that can be--what's the word I'm looking for? Annoying--to a person.
(Julian and Darnell both look at Z funny)
Z
Just thought I'd put in my two cents.
Darnell
(a little soft)
I give Julian attention.
(to Julian)
I give you A LOT of attention.
Julian
Darnell, we've been friends since high school, going on years now. I know that the most important thing in your life is--well you--and everyone else comes second. It used to annoy me but now I'm just used to it. And I love you for who you are.
Z
And it's sad that you need to get used to your "bestfriend" throwing you to the side, Julian. Darnell is a HORRIBLE person and a HORRIBLE friend...
(to Darnell; smiling)
But I love you.
Darnell
(looks hurt)
Well, if I would have known this was beat up on Darnell day, I would have brought Z's special ed helmet to wear on my head. If you two hate me so much than why are you friends with me?
Julian
We don't HATE you, Darnell. We could NEVER hate you.
Z
Hm, speak for yourself.
Darnell
(gives Z a look)
Seriously though.
(looks like he cares)
You guys--really think that I'm THAT superficial, self-centered, and egostical?
Julian
(looks at Z; unsure)
I wouldn't call it all of that...
Z
I would! And probably a little bit more stuff that would have to be bleeped out.
Darnell
(pause)
You guys think I'm such a bad person? Ok, how about this? Z, have you found a job yet ever since you QUIT that housewife thing you were doing so your "boyfriend" didn't have to STRUGGLE to pay bills with that--blue collar paycheck he gets? Which by the way was stupid as hell. No matter what Stony said, you was getting paid boo.
Z
(sighs; depressed)
Don't remind me. Now I'm back to fishing for bookings and playing housewife to Stony and HE doesn't think he should pay me for my "pre-destined" duties of doing the house work. That man THINKS that I'm SUPPOSED to take care of him, isn't that crazy?
(Julian and Darnell both look at Z a little funny)
Julian
Well Z...Stony DOES bring home the majority of the money and pays for the bills.
Darnell
Majority? Stony brings home ALL the money...
(to Z)
All YOU bring home is the germs and bacteria from playing in the dumpster with the rest of your litter.
Julian
(interjecting)
BUT, we all know that you can work now. IF the pay is right for you. So all you NEED to do is find a job that pays you what your last job was paying or better.
Z
Where am I gonna find a job that pays me weekly for just basically catering to someone else's needs and waiting on them hand and foot?
Darnell
(brightly; smiling)
Start selling your soul, bitch because you're hired as my new assistant!
Z
(laughing loudly)
Oh--Oh God, that's funny! That's--that's funny, Darnell! Boy, you ARE hilarious!
Darnell
It pays four hundred a week.
(Z stops laughing and starts packing up his food in a take out plate)
Julian
What are you doing?
Z
Wrapping up this food so I have something to eat. Gonna work up an appetite after I finish dusting off Estelle's desk.
(Darnell and Julian laugh).
End of Scene.
Do you think Z and Darnell will make it through the day without killing each other at Z's new job?
Is Julian spending too much time with Vernon and neglecting his friends?
Send comments to twitter.com/Boyfriendznews
Ep. 2 Darnell "Fires" Estelle!!!
Darnell's Office-Interior
It's night time, Darnell is still looking in the classifieds for a new assistant.
Darnell
(frustrated; hits the intercom)
Estelle, can I see you for a minute?
Estelle
(on intercom)
Of course, sir.
(A few moments later, Estelle walks in with her things since she is packing up and ready to leave for the evening)
Estelle
(smiling)
What can I do for you, Mr.Brooks?
Darnell
(bluntly)
We need to talk about your position here at Brooks Reality. You've been wonderful for the past year and I can't say ENOUGH how much I...
(trying to find a lie)
APPRECIATE! Your--orthopedic shoes. Those are sicknen, bitch, where'd you get em'?
Estelle
(laughs a little)
Oh! Thank you, Mr.Brooks. You know, they do have them in your size. I saw that you walk a little slew footed.
Darnell
(biting his tongue)
Girl, I am gonna miss your compliements, Estelle. You're just...
(forces a smile)
Always so insightful. And shady.
(serious)
But back to the point.
Estelle
(smiling)
Before you finish, I just wanted to say sir that working for you his past year has been the highlight of my life. I feel so--ALIVE and active. Thank you for taking a chance on an old woman.
Darnell
(looks like he feels bad but doesn't want to)
You're--welcome, Estelle. Working with you this past year has been...an experience. A very different, very--hell, it's just been an experience.
Estelle
(still smiling)
Likewise, sir. Now...what did you need before I left for the evening?
(Darnell wants to fire her but can't bring himself to do it. He sees a paperweight on the table and picks it up, holding it out to her)
Darnell
(forced smile)
Here. It's your one year anniversary present.
(Estelle takes the paperweight and looks genuinely pleased)
Estelle
(happy)
Why THANK YOU, sir. This is one of the nicest things anyone's ever given to me.
(Darnell looks like he wants to kill himself)
Darnell
(long sigh; fake smile)
I'm never gonna get rid of you, am I?
Estelle
(smiling)
Nope. Until I die, you'll be stuck with me forever.
(looks at watch)
I should really get going. Old lady like me driving at night isn't always safe.
(turns around; starts walking to the door)
Darnell
(bends down behind his desk; locking up his things)
It's not safe for you to be up in here either...
(under his breath)
With all these sharp objects laying around.
Estelle
What did you say, sir?
Darnell
(playing it off)
I said it's not safe for you in here either. You know, with it being so late and all. Somebody could just come along and trip ya down the stairs...
(gets a look on his face like he's forming a plan)
Or cut the elevator cord when you're GOING downstairs. In the elevator.
Estelle
(laughs a little)
Oh, I'm always careful sir. But thank you for showing you care.
(Estelle leaves Darnell's office)
Darnell
Yeah, I care...about getting the right coffee, you nut.
(Darnell looks on his desk, seeing the paperweight gone and realizes something as his eyes go wide)
Darnell
Oh hell to the no! That was a three hundred dollar paperweight!
(Darnell runs to the door and opens it, calling after Estelle whose getting on the elevator doors. As they're closing, she waves goodbye to Darnell)
Darnell
Estelle, wait! Gimme that paperweight back! I got you a sicknen...
(looks around; grabs the pen from his pocket)
PEN! You WILL work this pen, boo...
(starts walking to the elevator)
Granny, you will NOT get me tonight, gimme it!
End of Scene.
Who is Darnell going to get to replace Estelle?!?!
Send comments to twitter.com/Boyfriendznews
It's night time, Darnell is still looking in the classifieds for a new assistant.
Darnell
(frustrated; hits the intercom)
Estelle, can I see you for a minute?
Estelle
(on intercom)
Of course, sir.
(A few moments later, Estelle walks in with her things since she is packing up and ready to leave for the evening)
Estelle
(smiling)
What can I do for you, Mr.Brooks?
Darnell
(bluntly)
We need to talk about your position here at Brooks Reality. You've been wonderful for the past year and I can't say ENOUGH how much I...
(trying to find a lie)
APPRECIATE! Your--orthopedic shoes. Those are sicknen, bitch, where'd you get em'?
Estelle
(laughs a little)
Oh! Thank you, Mr.Brooks. You know, they do have them in your size. I saw that you walk a little slew footed.
Darnell
(biting his tongue)
Girl, I am gonna miss your compliements, Estelle. You're just...
(forces a smile)
Always so insightful. And shady.
(serious)
But back to the point.
Estelle
(smiling)
Before you finish, I just wanted to say sir that working for you his past year has been the highlight of my life. I feel so--ALIVE and active. Thank you for taking a chance on an old woman.
Darnell
(looks like he feels bad but doesn't want to)
You're--welcome, Estelle. Working with you this past year has been...an experience. A very different, very--hell, it's just been an experience.
Estelle
(still smiling)
Likewise, sir. Now...what did you need before I left for the evening?
(Darnell wants to fire her but can't bring himself to do it. He sees a paperweight on the table and picks it up, holding it out to her)
Darnell
(forced smile)
Here. It's your one year anniversary present.
(Estelle takes the paperweight and looks genuinely pleased)
Estelle
(happy)
Why THANK YOU, sir. This is one of the nicest things anyone's ever given to me.
(Darnell looks like he wants to kill himself)
Darnell
(long sigh; fake smile)
I'm never gonna get rid of you, am I?
Estelle
(smiling)
Nope. Until I die, you'll be stuck with me forever.
(looks at watch)
I should really get going. Old lady like me driving at night isn't always safe.
(turns around; starts walking to the door)
Darnell
(bends down behind his desk; locking up his things)
It's not safe for you to be up in here either...
(under his breath)
With all these sharp objects laying around.
Estelle
What did you say, sir?
Darnell
(playing it off)
I said it's not safe for you in here either. You know, with it being so late and all. Somebody could just come along and trip ya down the stairs...
(gets a look on his face like he's forming a plan)
Or cut the elevator cord when you're GOING downstairs. In the elevator.
Estelle
(laughs a little)
Oh, I'm always careful sir. But thank you for showing you care.
(Estelle leaves Darnell's office)
Darnell
Yeah, I care...about getting the right coffee, you nut.
(Darnell looks on his desk, seeing the paperweight gone and realizes something as his eyes go wide)
Darnell
Oh hell to the no! That was a three hundred dollar paperweight!
(Darnell runs to the door and opens it, calling after Estelle whose getting on the elevator doors. As they're closing, she waves goodbye to Darnell)
Darnell
Estelle, wait! Gimme that paperweight back! I got you a sicknen...
(looks around; grabs the pen from his pocket)
PEN! You WILL work this pen, boo...
(starts walking to the elevator)
Granny, you will NOT get me tonight, gimme it!
End of Scene.
Who is Darnell going to get to replace Estelle?!?!
Send comments to twitter.com/Boyfriendznews
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